Episode Transcript: Spy Buddies

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==Dialogue==
 
==Dialogue==
 +
(a shadow that looks like Plankton walks up to the Krusty Krab and gets inside using the code. He goes back into the office and opens up the safe and gets out the formula. SpongeBob turns on the lights to reveal the shadow is Mr. Krabs)
  
(A shadow that looks like Plankton walks up to the Krusty Krab and gets inside using the code. He goes back into the office and opens up the safe and gets out the formula. SpongeBob turns on the lights to reveal the shadow is Mr. Krabs)
+
'''SpongeBob''': What are you doing, Mr. Krabs?
  
SpongeBob: What are you doing, Mr. Krabs?
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': Just making sure the Krabby Patty formula is safe. Plankton hasn't tried to steal the formula in over a month. He must be planning something big.
  
Mr. Krabs: Just making sure the Krabby Patty formula is safe. Plankton hasn't tried to steal the formula in over a month. He must be planning something big.
+
'''Squidward''': (walks in) Hello.
  
Squidward: (walks in) Hello.
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': One of you will have to volunteer for some extra work.
  
Mr. Krabs: One of you will have to volunteer for some extra work.
+
'''Squidward''': (walks out) Good-bye.
  
Squidward: (walks out) Good-bye.
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': I was just gonna ask if someone can spy on Plankton.
  
Mr. Krabs: I was just gonna ask if someone can spy on Plankton.
+
'''SpongeBob''': Spy?! Ooh! (acts like James Bond)
  
SpongeBob: Spy?! Ooh! (acts like James Bond)
+
'''Patrick''': Hey, SpongeBob, I can see you through this straw.
  
Patrick: Hey, SpongeBob, I can see you through this straw.
+
'''SpongeBob''': Patrick, I'm gonna be a spy.
  
SpongeBob: Patrick, I'm gonna be a spy.
+
'''Patrick''': You're a spy?! I wanna be a spy, too!
  
Patrick: You're a spy?! I wanna be a spy, too!
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': Shh! Okay, okay! You can be a spy. Just be quiet.
  
Mr. Krabs: Shh! Okay, okay! You can be a spy. Just be quiet.
+
'''SpongeBob and Patrick''': Hooray, we're spy buddies! (Mr. Krabs stammers. SpongeBob & Patrick whisper) Spy buddies.
  
SpongeBob & Patrick: Hooray, we're spy buddies! (Mr. Krabs stammers. SpongeBob & Patrick whisper) Spy buddies.
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': Your instructions are on this Krabby Patty. But remember, the fate of the Krusty Krab rests in your hands, SpongeBob.
  
Mr. Krabs: Your instructions are on this Krabby Patty. But remember, the fate of the Krusty Krab rests in your hands, SpongeBob.
+
'''SpongeBob''': In my hands... ooh!
  
SpongeBob: In my hands... ooh!
+
'''Patrick''': (examines SpongeBob’s hand) Ooh. (cut to SpongeBob’s house later that night where SpongeBob pushes the button on the patty)
  
Patrick: (examines SpongeBob’s hand) Ooh. (cut to SpongeBob’s house later that night where SpongeBob pushes the button on the patty)
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': Your mission --if you choose to accept it-- is to discover what Plankton's up to. Don't let him out of your sight. And you'll need to rustle up some spy gadgets. If you don't accept it, you're fired! This patty will self-destruct in ten seconds. (both scream and run around while the patty is beeping)
  
Mr. Krabs: You're mission-- if you choose to accept it-- is to discover what Plankton's up to. Don't let him out of your sight. You'll need to rustle up some spy gadgets. If you don't accept it, you're fired! This patty will self-destruct in ten seconds. (both scream and run around while the patty is beeping)
+
'''SpongeBob''': Get rid of it! Get rid of it, Patrick! (Patrick puts the patty in his pants. It explodes and leaves the bottom half of his body without any skin)
  
SpongeBob: Get rid of it! Get rid of it, Patrick! (Patrick puts the patty in his pants. It explodes and leaves the bottom half of his body without any skin)
+
'''Patrick''': That's gonna leave a mark. (bubble-wipe to Sandy's Treedome)
  
Patrick: That's gonna leave a mark. (cut to Sandy's treedome)
+
'''SpongeBob''': Hey, Sandy.
  
SpongeBob: Hey, Sandy.
+
'''Sandy''': Hey, SpongeBob, Patrick. What y'all doing?
  
Sandy: Hey, SpongeBob, Patrick. What y'all doing?
+
'''SpongeBob''': Do you know anything about spying, Sandy?
  
SpongeBob: Do you know anything about spying, Sandy?
+
'''Sandy''': Well, I know you need a lot of crazy gadgets like jet-packs and laser-equipped Bermuda shorts with walkie-talkies.
  
Sandy: Well, I know you need a lot of crazy gadgets like jet-packs and laser-equipped Bermuda shorts with walkie-talkies.
+
'''Walkie-talkie''': 10-4, good buddy. (static)
  
Walkie-talkie: 10-4, good buddy. (static)
+
'''Sandy''': Cameras that fit up your nose, high-powered magnifying glass, and my favorite, the knockout ray. (blasts SpongeBob and Patrick with it causes them to knockout. Then blasts them again making them wake up)
  
Sandy: Cameras that fit up your nose, high-powered magnifying glass, and my favorite, the knockout ray. (blasts SpongeBob and Patrick with it causes them to knockout. Then blasts them again making them wake up)
+
'''SpongeBob''': Wow, Sandy, with these gadgets, Patrick and I will be great spies.
  
SpongeBob: Wow, Sandy, with these gadgets, Patrick and I will be great spies.
+
'''Sandy''': (laughs) I wouldn't trust you two with any of this stuff.
  
Sandy: (laughs) I wouldn't trust you two with any of this stuff.
+
'''SpongeBob: What do we do now, Patrick? (Patrick picks up the knockout ray and knocks Sandy out. Both laugh. Bubble-wipe to the city where SpongeBob and Patrick are spying from the side of a building)
  
SpongeBob: What do we do now, Patrick? (Patrick picks up the knockout ray and knocks Sandy out. Both laugh. Cut to the city where SpongeBob and Patrick are spying from the side of a building)
+
'''Patrick''': What's he doing now?
  
Patrick: What's he doing now?
+
'''SpongeBob''': Nothing yet. Wait! Wait! He's... (Plankton walks into "Guppies R Us") ...buying baby clothes? We gotta get closer.
  
SpongeBob: Nothing yet. Wait! Wait! He's... (Plankton walks into "Guppies R Us") ...buying baby clothes? We gotta get closer.
+
'''Plankton''': Excuse me? (holds up a small pink outfit) Do you have anything in a size negative five?
  
Plankton: Excuse me? (holds up a small pink outfit) Do you have anything in a size negative five?
+
'''Employee''': (laughs) Uh, sorry, bud, that's as small as they come. (takes the outfit. SpongeBob enlarges himself in the clothes on the wall)
  
Employee: (laughs) Uh, sorry, bud, that's as small as they come. (takes the outfit. SpongeBob enlarges himself in the clothes on the wall)
+
'''SpongeBob''': Wow, Plankton has to buy baby clothes? (Patrick enlarges himself in the outfit next to SpongeBob)
  
SpongeBob: Wow, Plankton has to buy baby clothes? (Patrick enlarges himself in the outfit next to SpongeBob)
+
'''Patrick''': How embarrassing. (Plankton walks out of "Guppies R Us". SpongeBob walks out a couple seconds later)
  
Patrick: How embarrassing. (Plankton walks out of "Guppies R Us". SpongeBob walks out a couple seconds later)
+
'''SpongeBob''': SpongeBob to Krabs. Come in Krabs.
  
SpongeBob: SpongeBob to Krabs. Come in Krabs.
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': Krabs here. Go ahead.
  
Mr. Krabs: Krabs here. Go ahead.
+
'''SpongeBob''': Plankton just bought some baby clothes.
  
SpongeBob: Plankton just bought some baby clothes.
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': (writes 'baby clothes' on a nearby chalkboard) Baby clothes? Hmm... What's he doing now?
  
Mr. Krabs: Baby clothes? Hmm... (writes 'baby clothes' on the chalkboard) What's he doing now?
+
'''SpongeBob''': Hold on. (looks through store window) He's buying...
  
SpongeBob: Hold on. (looks through store window) He's buying...
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': Yeah? Yeah?
  
Mr. Krabs: Yeah? Yeah?
+
'''SpongeBob''': A... stamp.
  
SpongeBob: A... stamp.
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': A stamp. (writes it on the chalkboard) This is the most elaborate scheme ever. Keep on him, SpongeBob. (cut to later where SpongeBob and Patrick are tip-toeing behind Plankton)
  
Mr. Krabs: A stamp. (writes it on the chalkboard) This is the most elaborate scheme ever. Keep on him, SpongeBob. (cut to later where SpongeBob and Patrick are tip-toeing behind Plankton)
+
'''SpongeBob''': We're right behind him and he has no idea. (from Plankton's POV, the tip-toes are thunderous steps. He turns around)
  
SpongeBob: We're right behind him and he has no idea. (from Plankton's POV, the tip-toes are thunderous steps. He turns around)
+
'''Plankton''': Would you stop making all that racket? (from SpongeBob and Patrick's POV, Plankton is squeaking as he talks so they can't understand him)
  
Plankton: Would you stop making all that racket? (from SpongeBob and Patrick's POV, Plankton is squeaking as he talks so they can't understand him)
+
'''Patrick''': What's he doing now?
  
Patrick: What's he doing now?
+
'''SpongeBob''': I can't tell. (they walk again but SpongeBob is shining a light on Plankton from the magnifying glass)
  
SpongeBob: I can't tell. (they walk again but SpongeBob is shining a light on Plankton from the magnifying glass)
+
'''Plankton''': Phew! Gosh, it's hot. (catches on fire and runs away screaming)
  
Plankton: Phew! Gosh, it's hot. (catches on fire and runs away screaming)
+
'''SpongeBob''': He's getting away! Quick, Patrick, use the jet-pack!
  
SpongeBob: He's getting away! Quick, Patrick, use the jet-pack!
+
'''Patrick: Can do! (pushes a button and Patrick grabs SpongeBob as they fly toward Plankton. Plankton jumps into a soda drink and puts himself out)
  
Patrick: Can do! (pushes a button and Patrick grabs SpongeBob as they fly toward Plankton. Plankton jumps into a soda drink and puts himself out)
+
'''Plankton: Phew. Huh? (SpongeBob and Patrick are fly over Plankton, setting him and the cup on fire, while they fly through buildings. The jet-pack detaches itself from Patrick and they both skid on the sidewalk. When they stand up, their faces and bodies are deformed)
  
Plankton: Phew. Huh? (SpongeBob and Patrick are fly over Plankton, setting him and the cup on fire, while they fly through buildings. The jet-pack detaches itself from Patrick and they both skid on the sidewalk. When they stand up, their faces and bodies are deformed)
+
'''SpongeBob''': Boy, it was lucky the sidewalk broke our fall. But we lost Plankton!
  
SpongeBob: Boy, it was lucky the sidewalk broke out fall. But we lost Plankton!
+
'''Patrick''': To the spy mobile! (both hop into a car)
  
Patrick: To the spy mobile! (both hop into the car)
+
'''SpongeBob''': Hmmm... mines, oil slick, smoke screen, shield...
  
SpongeBob: Hmmm... mines, oil slick, smoke screen, shield...
+
'''Patrick''': Self-destruct! (pushes button and the car explodes. Both laugh and shake off the dust. Patrick's pants phone is ringing) There's a call coming through on my Pants-A-Phone.
  
Patrick: Self destruct!! (pushes button and the car explodes. Both laugh. Patrick's pants phone is ringing) There's a call coming through on my Pants-A-Phone.
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': (from the Pants-A-Phone) Krabs to Agent SpongeBob. Come in SpongeBob.
  
Mr. Krabs: Krabs to Agent SpongeBob. Come in SpongeBob.
+
'''Patrick''': It's for you.
  
Patrick: It's for you.
+
'''SpongeBob''': Agent SpongeBob here.
  
SpongeBob: Agent SpongeBob here.
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': You found out what Plankton's up to?
  
Mr. Krabs: You found out what Plankton's up to?
+
'''SpongeBob''': I'm afraid we lost him, Mr. Krabs.
  
SpongeBob: I'm afraid we lost him, Mr. Krabs.
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': Well, find him, lad. I'm not paying you to goof off with Patrick.
  
Mr. Krabs: Well, find him, lad. I'm not paying you to goof off with Patrick.
+
'''SpongeBob''': You're not paying me at all, Mr. Krabs.
  
SpongeBob: You're not paying me at all, Mr. Krabs.
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': Exactly. So get to work. (hangs up)
  
Mr. Krabs: Exactly. So get to work. (hangs up)
+
'''Recording''': If you'd like to make a call, please deposit twenty-five cents. (SpongeBob gets out a quarter. Bubble-wipe to the Chum Bucket at night. SpongeBob and Patrick are on the roof)
  
Recording: If you'd like to make a call, please deposit twenty-five cents. (SpongeBob gets out a quarter. Cut to the Chum Bucket at night. SpongeBob and Patrick are on the roof)
+
'''SpongeBob''': OK, Patrick, we're in position. Now how do we get inside?
  
SpongeBob: Ok, Patrick, we're in position. Now how do we get inside?
+
'''Patrick''': I think the front door's open.
  
Patrick: I think the front door's open.
+
'''SpongeBob''': Spies don't use the front door, Patrick. We've got to figure out a complicated way to get inside.
  
SpongeBob: Spies don't use the front door, Patrick. We've got to figure out a complicated way to get inside.
+
'''Patrick''': This looks like a job for Patrick Star Laser Pants! (shoots a laser out of his behind and cuts out a square on the roof) Ooh!!
  
Patrick: This looks like a job for Patrick Star Laser Pants! Ooh!! (shoots a laser out of his behind and cuts out a square on the roof)
+
'''SpongeBob''': Good work, Patrick! Now it's my turn. (drops down inside, with the rope tied around him. He lowers himself but hits the floor) I thought you were holding the rope. (Patrick lands on top of him)
  
SpongeBob: Good work, Patrick! Now it's my turn. (drops down inside, with the rope tied around him. He lowers himself but hits the floor) I thought you were holding the rope. (Patrick lands on top of him)
+
'''Patrick''': I am. You need to be quiet. We're on a secret mission!
  
Patrick: I am. You need to be quiet. We're on a secret mission!
+
'''Plankton''': (turns on the lights) Secret mission, eh? {SpongeBob and Patrick scream} Don't you think I know what you're up to? You want to eat at the Chum Bucket without your boss knowing. Karen, we've got a customer! (cut to SpongeBob and Patrick sitting at a table holding menus and Plankton standing on the table) I'll let you two look over the menu. (He jumps off and walks away)
  
Plankton: (turns on the lights) Secret mission, eh? {SpongeBob and Patrick scream} Don't you think I know what you're up to? You want to eat at the Chum Bucket without your boss knowing. Karen, we've got a customer! (cut to SpongeBob and Patrick sitting at a table holding menus and Plankton standing on the table) I'll let you two look over the menu. (He jumps off and walks away)
+
'''Patrick''': SpongeBob, I have to go.
  
Patrick: SpongeBob, I have to go.
+
'''SpongeBob''': Oh, can't you go later?
  
SpongeBob: Oh, can't you go later?
+
'''Patrick''': (Groans) My laser pants aren't working right. (shoots a laser at the salt shaker on the other table. Patrick sighs)
  
Patrick: {Groans} My laser pants aren't working right. (shoots a laser at the salt shaker on the other table. Patrick sighs)
+
'''Plankton''': Could I interest you in a raspberry ice tea?
  
Plankton: Could I interest you in a raspberry ice tea?
+
'''Patrick''': Uh, no thanks.
  
Patrick: Uh, no thanks.
+
'''Plankton''': Or perhaps a bran muffin?
  
Plankton: Or perhaps a bran muffin?
+
'''Patrick''': (groans again) SpongeBob, I have to go now!
  
Patrick: {groans again} SpongeBob, I have to go now!
+
'''Plankton''': Prune Danish? (sees Patrick's behind wiggle. Patrick groans again) What the...? (cut to outside the Chum Bucket where Patrick's laser pants makes holes everywhere and destroys the Chum Bucket. Later, the floor opens up and a blimp emerges with Plankton controlling it from the inside and SpongeBob and Patrick lying on top. Patrick sits up while SpongeBob continues to lie down) Destroy my lab, will ya, Krabs? Well, if it's war you want, it's war you'll get! (flies his blimp over to the Krusty Krab. The inside of the Krusty Krab gets darker)
  
Plankton: Prune Danish? (sees Patrick's behind wiggle. Patrick groans again) What the...? (pan out to the Chum Bucket building where Patrick's laser pants makes holes everywhere and destroys the Chum Bucket. Later, the floor opens up and a blimp emerges with Plankton controlling it from the inside and SpongeBob and Patrick lying on top. Patrick sits up while SpongeBob continues to lie down) Destroy my lab, will ya, Krabs? Well, if it's war you want, it's war you'll get! (flies his blimp over to the Krusty Krab. The inside of the Krusty Krab gets darker)
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': Is it dark or have I put up with cataract surgery too long?
  
Mr. Krabs: Is it dark or have I put up with cataract surgery too long?
+
'''Squidward''': No, Mr. Krabs, it's that time of the month.
  
Squidward: No, Mr. Krabs, it's that time of the month.
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': (sees the blimp) Merciful Neptune. (red light flashes) Man your battle stations!
  
Mr. Krabs: (sees the blimp) Merciful Neptune. (red light flashes) Man your battle stations!
+
'''Squidward''': I'm on it! (runs into the bathroom and flushes a toilet)
  
Squidward: I'm on it! (runs into the bathroom and flushes a toilet)
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': (raises himself in the crow's nest) Bring it on, Plankton.
  
Mr. Krabs: (raises himself in the crow's nest) Bring it on, Plankton.
+
'''Plankton''': Oh, I will. We'll see if you have a customer left after I pump up the volume. (loud 50's pop music plays. All the customers cover their ears)
  
Plankton: Oh, I will. We'll see if you have a customer left after I pump up the volume. (loud 50's pop music plays. All the customers cover their ears)
+
'''Fis'''h: Oh, brother, I hated the real version of this song. (customers leave)
  
Fish: Oh, brother, I hated the real version of this song. (customers leave)
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': He's driving me customers away! Alright, Plankton, you want my customers so badly? You can have 'em! (sucks them all up and launches them through a cannon at the blimp)
  
Mr. Krabs: He's driving me customers away! Alright, Plankton, you want my customers so badly? You can have 'em! (sucks them all up and launches them through a cannon at the blimp)
+
'''Plankton''': Do your worst, Krabs!
  
Plankton: Do your worst, Krabs!
+
'''Squidward''': (hits the blimp) I hate my job.
  
Squidward: (hits the blimp) I hate my job.
+
'''SpongeBob''': (watching from the top of the blimp) It's up to you and me, buddy.
  
SpongeBob: (watching from the top of the blimp) It's up to you and me, buddy.
+
'''Patrick''': Abandon ship! (jumps off the blimp and lands in the cannon. Gets shot out towards the blimp)
  
Patrick: Abandon ship! (jumps off the blimp and lands in the cannon. Patrick was shot out towards the blimp)
+
'''Plankton''': Point-headed projectile on the port side! (Patrick makes a hole in the blimp, causing it to fly into the Krusty Krab)
  
Plankton: Point-headed projectile on the port side! (Patrick makes a hole in the blimp, causing it to fly into the Krusty Krab and destroy it)
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': No! (the blimp hits the Krusty Krab and destroys it)
  
Mr. Krabs: No!
+
'''Plankton''': (standing on the Krusty Krab sign with a piece of paper in his hand) I win! I always win!
  
Plankton: (standing on the Krusty Krab sign with a piece of paper in his hand) I win! I always win!
+
'''SpongeBob''': Not to rain on your parade or anything, but you always lose.
  
SpongeBob: Not to rain on your parade or anything, but you always lose.
+
'''Plankton''': No, SpongeBob, I always... (removes his head to reveal that of Mr. Krabs)
  
Plankton: No, SpongeBob, I always... (his head turns into Mr. Krabs)
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': ...win!
  
Mr. Krabs: ...win!
+
'''SpongeBob''': (gasps) Mr. Krabs?
  
SpongeBob: (gasps) Mr. Krabs?
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': That's right! I stole me own formular!
  
Mr. Krabs: That's right! I stole me own formular!
+
'''SpongeBob''': But if you're Mr. Krabs, then who's... (the other Mr. Krabs rips off his suit to show the Robot Krabs from "Imitation Krabs") Mr. Krabs is a robot! (Robot Krabs opens its head up to reveal Plankton)
  
SpongeBob: But if you're Mr. Krabs, then who's... (the other Mr. Krabs rips off his suit to show the Robot Krabs from "Imitation Krabs") Mr. Krabs is a robot!! (Robot Krabs opens its head up to reveal Plankton)
+
'''Plankton''': No, you idiot.
  
Plankton: No, you idiot.
+
'''SpongeBob''': Plankton?! What the barnacles is going on here?
  
SpongeBob: Plankton?! What the barnacles is going on here?
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': You see, we had a bet. Plankton's been trying for twenty years to steal me formula, and he's never done it.
  
Mr. Krabs: You see, we had a bet. Plankton's been trying for twenty years to steal me formula, and he's never done it.
+
'''Plankton''': I almost had it 37 times, and you know it!
  
Plankton: I almost had it 37 times, and you know it!
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': Tell it to the claw, sister. Last time he failed, we made a bet. (flashback to Mr Krabs laughing while Plankton is crying on the ground) You can't beat me, Plankton. I always win!
  
Mr. Krabs: Tell it to the claw, sister. Last time he failed, we made a bet. (flashback to Mr Krabs laughing while Plankton is crying on the ground) You can't beat me, Plankton. I always win!
+
'''Plankton''': You've got the easy part. I'd like to see you do my job.
  
Plankton: You've got the easy part. I'd like to see you do my job.
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': Oh, yeah right. If I was you, I could steal me formular on me first try.
  
Mr. Krabs: Oh, yeah right. If I was you, I could steal me formular on me first try.
+
'''Plankton''': Ha! The usual wager?
  
Plankton: Ha! The usual wager?
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': You're on. (flashback ends) So, through a series of events far too elaborate to go into right now, we flawlessly assumed each others lives and I beat Plankton at his own game... and destroyed his place of business!! (laughs) Now pay up.
  
Mr. Krabs: You're on. (flashback ends) So, through a series of events far too elaborate to go into right now, we flawlessly assumed each others lives and I beat Plankton at his own game... and destroyed his place of business!! (laughs) Now pay up.
+
'''Plankton''': Here you go, Eugene! (takes out a dollar) One a-dollar!
  
Plankton: Here you go, Eugene! (takes out a dollar) One a-dollar!
+
'''Patrick''': Not so fast! (rips his suit off to reveal Squidward)
  
Patrick: Not so fast! (rips his suit off to reveal Squidward)
+
'''SpongeBob''': Squidward? Then who are you?
  
SpongeBob: Squidward? Then who are you?
+
'''Squidward''': I'm not... (SpongeBob tears off his face) ...wearing a disguise.
  
Squidward: I'm not... (SpongeBob tears off his face) ...wearing a disguise.
+
'''SpongeBob''': Hmmm, if he's Squidward, then you must be... (fake Squidward rips off his suit to reveal Sandy) ...Sandy?
  
SpongeBob: Hmmm, if he's Squidward, then you must be... (fake Squidward rips off his suit to reveal Sandy) ...Sandy?
+
'''Sandy''': Whoops, wrong outfit. (rips off suit to reveal another SpongeBob)
  
Sandy: Whoops, wrong outfit. (rips off suit to reveal another SpongeBob)
+
'''SpongeBob''': (gasping) OOOOOOHHHHH!! You're me! Then I must be... (rips off his suit to reveal Patrick)
  
SpongeBob: (gasping) OOOOOOHHHHH!! You're me! Then I must be... (rips off his suit to reveal Patrick)
+
'''Patrick''': Patrick!
  
Patrick: Patrick!
+
'''SpongeBob''': Nah, I'm just kidding. (rips off the SpongeBob suit and reveals another Patrick)
  
SpongeBob: Nah, I'm just kidding. (rips off the SpongeBob suit and reveals another Patrick)
+
'''Patrick''': I really am Patrick. (laughs. Other Patrick rips off his suit to reveal SpongeBob again)
  
Patrick: I really am Patrick. (laughs. Other Patrick rips off his suit to reveal SpongeBob again)
+
'''SpongeBob''': Good one, Patrick! (both laugh) There's just one thing I don't understand.
 
+
SpongeBob: Good one, Patrick! (both laugh) There's just one thing I don't understand.
+
 
+
Mr. Krabs What's that, laddie?
+
 
+
SpongeBob: That. (points to two Patrick's laughing beside each other)
+
 
+
{{Template:Transcripts/Season 5}}
+
  
 +
'''Mr. Krabs''': What's that, laddie?
  
 +
'''SpongeBob''': That. (points to two Patrick's laughing beside each other)
  
 +
{{Timeline}}
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{{Transcripts/Season 5}}
 
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Revision as of 23:38, 7 October 2022

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Fungus Among Us Boat Smarts

Characters

Dialogue

(a shadow that looks like Plankton walks up to the Krusty Krab and gets inside using the code. He goes back into the office and opens up the safe and gets out the formula. SpongeBob turns on the lights to reveal the shadow is Mr. Krabs)

SpongeBob: What are you doing, Mr. Krabs?

Mr. Krabs: Just making sure the Krabby Patty formula is safe. Plankton hasn't tried to steal the formula in over a month. He must be planning something big.

Squidward: (walks in) Hello.

Mr. Krabs: One of you will have to volunteer for some extra work.

Squidward: (walks out) Good-bye.

Mr. Krabs: I was just gonna ask if someone can spy on Plankton.

SpongeBob: Spy?! Ooh! (acts like James Bond)

Patrick: Hey, SpongeBob, I can see you through this straw.

SpongeBob: Patrick, I'm gonna be a spy.

Patrick: You're a spy?! I wanna be a spy, too!

Mr. Krabs: Shh! Okay, okay! You can be a spy. Just be quiet.

SpongeBob and Patrick: Hooray, we're spy buddies! (Mr. Krabs stammers. SpongeBob & Patrick whisper) Spy buddies.

Mr. Krabs: Your instructions are on this Krabby Patty. But remember, the fate of the Krusty Krab rests in your hands, SpongeBob.

SpongeBob: In my hands... ooh!

Patrick: (examines SpongeBob’s hand) Ooh. (cut to SpongeBob’s house later that night where SpongeBob pushes the button on the patty)

Mr. Krabs: Your mission --if you choose to accept it-- is to discover what Plankton's up to. Don't let him out of your sight. And you'll need to rustle up some spy gadgets. If you don't accept it, you're fired! This patty will self-destruct in ten seconds. (both scream and run around while the patty is beeping)

SpongeBob: Get rid of it! Get rid of it, Patrick! (Patrick puts the patty in his pants. It explodes and leaves the bottom half of his body without any skin)

Patrick: That's gonna leave a mark. (bubble-wipe to Sandy's Treedome)

SpongeBob: Hey, Sandy.

Sandy: Hey, SpongeBob, Patrick. What y'all doing?

SpongeBob: Do you know anything about spying, Sandy?

Sandy: Well, I know you need a lot of crazy gadgets like jet-packs and laser-equipped Bermuda shorts with walkie-talkies.

Walkie-talkie: 10-4, good buddy. (static)

Sandy: Cameras that fit up your nose, high-powered magnifying glass, and my favorite, the knockout ray. (blasts SpongeBob and Patrick with it causes them to knockout. Then blasts them again making them wake up)

SpongeBob: Wow, Sandy, with these gadgets, Patrick and I will be great spies.

Sandy: (laughs) I wouldn't trust you two with any of this stuff.

SpongeBob: What do we do now, Patrick? (Patrick picks up the knockout ray and knocks Sandy out. Both laugh. Bubble-wipe to the city where SpongeBob and Patrick are spying from the side of a building)

Patrick: What's he doing now?

SpongeBob: Nothing yet. Wait! Wait! He's... (Plankton walks into "Guppies R Us") ...buying baby clothes? We gotta get closer.

Plankton: Excuse me? (holds up a small pink outfit) Do you have anything in a size negative five?

Employee: (laughs) Uh, sorry, bud, that's as small as they come. (takes the outfit. SpongeBob enlarges himself in the clothes on the wall)

SpongeBob: Wow, Plankton has to buy baby clothes? (Patrick enlarges himself in the outfit next to SpongeBob)

Patrick: How embarrassing. (Plankton walks out of "Guppies R Us". SpongeBob walks out a couple seconds later)

SpongeBob: SpongeBob to Krabs. Come in Krabs.

Mr. Krabs: Krabs here. Go ahead.

SpongeBob: Plankton just bought some baby clothes.

Mr. Krabs: (writes 'baby clothes' on a nearby chalkboard) Baby clothes? Hmm... What's he doing now?

SpongeBob: Hold on. (looks through store window) He's buying...

Mr. Krabs: Yeah? Yeah?

SpongeBob: A... stamp.

Mr. Krabs: A stamp. (writes it on the chalkboard) This is the most elaborate scheme ever. Keep on him, SpongeBob. (cut to later where SpongeBob and Patrick are tip-toeing behind Plankton)

SpongeBob: We're right behind him and he has no idea. (from Plankton's POV, the tip-toes are thunderous steps. He turns around)

Plankton: Would you stop making all that racket? (from SpongeBob and Patrick's POV, Plankton is squeaking as he talks so they can't understand him)

Patrick: What's he doing now?

SpongeBob: I can't tell. (they walk again but SpongeBob is shining a light on Plankton from the magnifying glass)

Plankton: Phew! Gosh, it's hot. (catches on fire and runs away screaming)

SpongeBob: He's getting away! Quick, Patrick, use the jet-pack!

Patrick: Can do! (pushes a button and Patrick grabs SpongeBob as they fly toward Plankton. Plankton jumps into a soda drink and puts himself out)

Plankton: Phew. Huh? (SpongeBob and Patrick are fly over Plankton, setting him and the cup on fire, while they fly through buildings. The jet-pack detaches itself from Patrick and they both skid on the sidewalk. When they stand up, their faces and bodies are deformed)

SpongeBob: Boy, it was lucky the sidewalk broke our fall. But we lost Plankton!

Patrick: To the spy mobile! (both hop into a car)

SpongeBob: Hmmm... mines, oil slick, smoke screen, shield...

Patrick: Self-destruct! (pushes button and the car explodes. Both laugh and shake off the dust. Patrick's pants phone is ringing) There's a call coming through on my Pants-A-Phone.

Mr. Krabs: (from the Pants-A-Phone) Krabs to Agent SpongeBob. Come in SpongeBob.

Patrick: It's for you.

SpongeBob: Agent SpongeBob here.

Mr. Krabs: You found out what Plankton's up to?

SpongeBob: I'm afraid we lost him, Mr. Krabs.

Mr. Krabs: Well, find him, lad. I'm not paying you to goof off with Patrick.

SpongeBob: You're not paying me at all, Mr. Krabs.

Mr. Krabs: Exactly. So get to work. (hangs up)

Recording: If you'd like to make a call, please deposit twenty-five cents. (SpongeBob gets out a quarter. Bubble-wipe to the Chum Bucket at night. SpongeBob and Patrick are on the roof)

SpongeBob: OK, Patrick, we're in position. Now how do we get inside?

Patrick: I think the front door's open.

SpongeBob: Spies don't use the front door, Patrick. We've got to figure out a complicated way to get inside.

Patrick: This looks like a job for Patrick Star Laser Pants! (shoots a laser out of his behind and cuts out a square on the roof) Ooh!!

SpongeBob: Good work, Patrick! Now it's my turn. (drops down inside, with the rope tied around him. He lowers himself but hits the floor) I thought you were holding the rope. (Patrick lands on top of him)

Patrick: I am. You need to be quiet. We're on a secret mission!

Plankton: (turns on the lights) Secret mission, eh? {SpongeBob and Patrick scream} Don't you think I know what you're up to? You want to eat at the Chum Bucket without your boss knowing. Karen, we've got a customer! (cut to SpongeBob and Patrick sitting at a table holding menus and Plankton standing on the table) I'll let you two look over the menu. (He jumps off and walks away)

Patrick: SpongeBob, I have to go.

SpongeBob: Oh, can't you go later?

Patrick: (Groans) My laser pants aren't working right. (shoots a laser at the salt shaker on the other table. Patrick sighs)

Plankton: Could I interest you in a raspberry ice tea?

Patrick: Uh, no thanks.

Plankton: Or perhaps a bran muffin?

Patrick: (groans again) SpongeBob, I have to go now!

Plankton: Prune Danish? (sees Patrick's behind wiggle. Patrick groans again) What the...? (cut to outside the Chum Bucket where Patrick's laser pants makes holes everywhere and destroys the Chum Bucket. Later, the floor opens up and a blimp emerges with Plankton controlling it from the inside and SpongeBob and Patrick lying on top. Patrick sits up while SpongeBob continues to lie down) Destroy my lab, will ya, Krabs? Well, if it's war you want, it's war you'll get! (flies his blimp over to the Krusty Krab. The inside of the Krusty Krab gets darker)

Mr. Krabs: Is it dark or have I put up with cataract surgery too long?

Squidward: No, Mr. Krabs, it's that time of the month.

Mr. Krabs: (sees the blimp) Merciful Neptune. (red light flashes) Man your battle stations!

Squidward: I'm on it! (runs into the bathroom and flushes a toilet)

Mr. Krabs: (raises himself in the crow's nest) Bring it on, Plankton.

Plankton: Oh, I will. We'll see if you have a customer left after I pump up the volume. (loud 50's pop music plays. All the customers cover their ears)

Fish: Oh, brother, I hated the real version of this song. (customers leave)

Mr. Krabs: He's driving me customers away! Alright, Plankton, you want my customers so badly? You can have 'em! (sucks them all up and launches them through a cannon at the blimp)

Plankton: Do your worst, Krabs!

Squidward: (hits the blimp) I hate my job.

SpongeBob: (watching from the top of the blimp) It's up to you and me, buddy.

Patrick: Abandon ship! (jumps off the blimp and lands in the cannon. Gets shot out towards the blimp)

Plankton: Point-headed projectile on the port side! (Patrick makes a hole in the blimp, causing it to fly into the Krusty Krab)

Mr. Krabs: No! (the blimp hits the Krusty Krab and destroys it)

Plankton: (standing on the Krusty Krab sign with a piece of paper in his hand) I win! I always win!

SpongeBob: Not to rain on your parade or anything, but you always lose.

Plankton: No, SpongeBob, I always... (removes his head to reveal that of Mr. Krabs)

Mr. Krabs: ...win!

SpongeBob: (gasps) Mr. Krabs?

Mr. Krabs: That's right! I stole me own formular!

SpongeBob: But if you're Mr. Krabs, then who's... (the other Mr. Krabs rips off his suit to show the Robot Krabs from "Imitation Krabs") Mr. Krabs is a robot! (Robot Krabs opens its head up to reveal Plankton)

Plankton: No, you idiot.

SpongeBob: Plankton?! What the barnacles is going on here?

Mr. Krabs: You see, we had a bet. Plankton's been trying for twenty years to steal me formula, and he's never done it.

Plankton: I almost had it 37 times, and you know it!

Mr. Krabs: Tell it to the claw, sister. Last time he failed, we made a bet. (flashback to Mr Krabs laughing while Plankton is crying on the ground) You can't beat me, Plankton. I always win!

Plankton: You've got the easy part. I'd like to see you do my job.

Mr. Krabs: Oh, yeah right. If I was you, I could steal me formular on me first try.

Plankton: Ha! The usual wager?

Mr. Krabs: You're on. (flashback ends) So, through a series of events far too elaborate to go into right now, we flawlessly assumed each others lives and I beat Plankton at his own game... and destroyed his place of business!! (laughs) Now pay up.

Plankton: Here you go, Eugene! (takes out a dollar) One a-dollar!

Patrick: Not so fast! (rips his suit off to reveal Squidward)

SpongeBob: Squidward? Then who are you?

Squidward: I'm not... (SpongeBob tears off his face) ...wearing a disguise.

SpongeBob: Hmmm, if he's Squidward, then you must be... (fake Squidward rips off his suit to reveal Sandy) ...Sandy?

Sandy: Whoops, wrong outfit. (rips off suit to reveal another SpongeBob)

SpongeBob: (gasping) OOOOOOHHHHH!! You're me! Then I must be... (rips off his suit to reveal Patrick)

Patrick: Patrick!

SpongeBob: Nah, I'm just kidding. (rips off the SpongeBob suit and reveals another Patrick)

Patrick: I really am Patrick. (laughs. Other Patrick rips off his suit to reveal SpongeBob again)

SpongeBob: Good one, Patrick! (both laugh) There's just one thing I don't understand.

Mr. Krabs: What's that, laddie?

SpongeBob: That. (points to two Patrick's laughing beside each other)

Transcripts Episodes
Season 1 Season 1
Season 2 Season 2
Season 3 Season 3
Season 4 Season 4
Season 5 Season 5
Season 6 Season 6
Season 7 Season 7
Season 8 Season 8
Season 9 Season 9
Season 10 Season 10
Season 11 Season 11
Season 12 Season 12
Season 13 Season 13
Season 14 Season 14
Season 15 Season 15
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