Episode Transcript: Extreme Spots
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|Hello Bikini Bottom!|
Episode Article: Extreme Spots
(episode starts at Sand Mountain)
SpongeBob: A little more sand. Pat-pat-pat. Pat-pat- Patrick! Check it out. An exact replica of the Krusty Krab. One sandy patty. Extra grit.
Patrick: (gulps) A bit dry and flavorless. I'll take two dozen.
Fred: Hey everyone! The Drastic Radicals are doing extreme tricks!
Fishes: Oh, Johnny, Johnny! Oh, Johnny!
SpongeBob: Let's go check it out!
Patrick: Um, can you give me a hand?
SpongeBob: Sure thing, buddy. (Patrick whistles and Patrick's body comes and places his head on his body. People on Sand Mountain are chattering)
Patrick: I can't see anything.
SpongeBob: Allow me. (engine revs, crowd gasps)
Johnny Krill: Yeah! (laughs)
Patrick: Whoa! (bugle call)
SpongeBob: (gasps) Look out! (Not Dead Ted laughs)
SpongeBob: Someone help that little old lady!
Grand Maul Granny: Help yourself, himrods! (explosion, screaming together. Engine revs)
Narrator: Johnny Krill! Not Dead Ted! (Grand Maul Granny laughs) Grand Maul Granny (explosion. 2 wrecking balls swing) Drastic...Radicals! (wrecking balls collide and explode) THE DRASTICALS!
Patrick: Did you see that?
SpongeBob and Patrick: What was that?
Fancy Fish: Why, those are the Dwastic Wadicals, the number one practitioners of extweme spowts (sips tea)
SpongeBob & Patrick: Extreme what?
Fancy Fish: Extweme Spowts.
Patrick: Extreme Spots? Well, that's no fair. You're already covered in Extreme Spots. Ooh. Hold on a second. (hive buzzes. Patrick screams while electricity crackles) Okay, let's go meet our new heroes. (the Drasticals laugh)
SpongeBob: We want to join your extreme spots team, as you can see, we're also covered head to toe in the most extreme of spots. (Drasticals laugh)
Johnny Krill: It's extreme sports, not spots. So you wanna be a Drastical? Let's see what you got, little dude.
SpongeBob: No problemo. I guess you just hop up like this... (revs engines. Motorcycle drives off with his hands) Hey! Come back! (chases after it. Motorcycle goes faster) Heeeeyyy! (runs the other way. Motorcycle picks him up and he screams as he goes through sand dunes. Motorcycle stops. Faints)
Grand Maul Granny: (chuckling; to Patrick) Your turn, fat boy!
Patrick: Hey! How'd we get up here? (gets pushed off a cliff. Hits several rocks then falls off mountain)
Johnny Krill: Our sports are too extreme for you dudes. Maybe we should start you two on something easier. What games do you dudes like to play?
SpongeBob: Ooh, I know. How 'bout a little something called jump rope?
Johnny Krill: Jump rope, eh? Demonstrate.
SpongeBob: Ready, Patrick? On your mark, get set, jump rope!
Patrick: Extreme! (starts jumping) Hey, who's holding the other end?
SpongeBob: I am, of course. (camera pans to the right) Hi, Patrick!
Patrick: D'uh. (blows harmonica, starts singing) My best friend is SpongeBob, he has a square head, I try on his clothes while he's asleep in bed.
SpongeBob: Yeah! What?
Patrick: That's weird, my face is leaking.
SpongeBob: Your face isn't leaking. You're just sweating from all the exercise.
Patrick: EXERCISE! (stops) Ooh, I didn't sign up for this! (faints)
Johnny Krill: Dude, that was not extreme. Let the Drasticals show you how it's done. Grab it, Granny! (throws one end of the jump rope. Granny bites the end of the rope. Ted makes a somersault and lands on the rope with his tongue, then jumps back into the air)
Not Dead Ted: Drasticals! Whoo! Yeah! (lands and jumps over rope to the point where he steams up)
Johnny Krill: Kick it up a notch! (Ted sets aflame and shoots into the air)
SpongeBob and Patrick: Ooooh.
Not Dead Ted: YEAH!! (plane hits him. Falls face first into ground and burns to a crisp)
Johnny Krill: Yeah! See, extreme sports should be explosive! BOOM!
SpongeBob: Explosive, huh? I know just the thing! (dips bubble wand and blows bubble. Bubble pops) BOOM! (SpongeBob and Patrick make several explosion sounds) Impressed?
Johnny Krill: Look dudes, to be extreme you gotta go bigger. Show 'em, Drasticals! (Granny climbs a huge bottle of bubble soap, dips a huge wand and puts it in front of a ramp) Watch this! (rides his motorcycle into a bubble. Speeds into town and knocks over a building. Bubble pops and he gets crushed) Extreme. (tunnels back. Hops out of the ground) Now that's how you do extreme! You understand?
SpongeBob: I think I do. Is fighting extreme?
Johnny Krill: Fighting is totally extreme. (bubble-wipe to a wrestling ring)
Patrick: I want a clean fight. I don't wanna see any trash laying around. (rings his head instead of the bell. SpongeBob tries to punch a pillow, spins to the edge, launched back into pillow which land on his head) Oohh...We give up! Fling! (waves towel and throws at SpongeBob) That was close.
Johnny Krill: Not so fast, that's not fighting. Stand aside (stomps SpongeBob and Patrick out of the ring) I'll show you how it's done. (slams into pillow. Puts the pillow into a washing machine and sets it on wash)
SpongeBob: No! It's dry-clean only! (Johnny smashes the machine open and punches the pillow out of the ring)
Pillow: Avenge me.
Mattress: Charlie! (jumps into the ring and smashes Johnny several times)
SpongeBob: Even more brutal.
Johnny Krill: Now, that was extreme, dudes. You think you're starting to get it?
SpongeBob and Patrick: Oh yeah.
Johnny Krill: So what else you got?
SpongeBob: Well, there is one sport that Patrick's an expert at.
Patrick: Dumpster diving! (pushes a dumpster, climbs it, and jumps in. SpongeBob cheers. Patrick sinks in and pops out, coughing up some trash)
Johnny Krill: That's not extreme.
Patrick: (spits out old toothbrush) How revolting. (brushes teeth with it)
Johnny Krill: Okay, that's kinda extreme. Not bad, but the Drasticals will show you how it's done. (Ted brings in a ladder with diving board and Granny on top. Ladder is set higher)
Grand Maul Granny: Okay artificial hip, don't fail me now. (jumps into dumpster and chuckles. Johnny dumps her and trash into a garbage truck and crushes them with a compactor. Trash comes out a square shape and Granny pops out) EXTREME!
Patrick: That is one tough elderly person.
Johnny Krill: Dude, that was awesome! What other crazy sports do you dudes play?
SpongeBob: Well, there is a very extremely extreme sport we play if you're up to it. (at Jellyfish Fields, SpongeBob and Patrick chase after jellyfish)
Patrick: Hey, where are the Drasticals? (they feel ground shaking) Here they come! (Johnny catches jellyfish on motorcycle, Ted in the air, and Granny riding them like a tidal wave)
Johnny Krill: Jellyfishing, yeah... (jellyfish flies into his mouth and stings him, Ted flies into huge jellyfish and burns, thrown into Johnny and Granny and they get caught in an explosion. later, the Drasticals are covered in stings) Dudes, now we get it! These spots are way extreme!
Not Dead Ted: And itchy!
Fancy Fish: As you can see, extweme spots are the direct bi-product of the most extweme spowts.
Patrick: Who is that guy?