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Episode Transcript: Skill Crane
| Line 18: | Line 18: | ||
(Outside the Krusty Krab, a man is knocking on the doors) | (Outside the Krusty Krab, a man is knocking on the doors) | ||
| − | Squidward: Mr Krabs, some guy in a suit wants to come in before we open.<br> | + | Squidward: Mr. Krabs, some guy in a suit wants to come in before we open.<br> |
| − | Mr Krabs: What? Guy in a suit? No, it's a tax collector! (jumps inside | + | Mr. Krabs: What? Guy in a suit? No, it's a tax collector! (jumps inside SpongeBob) Hide us, SpongeBob! (takes the register in with him) We'll just walk non-schelauntly to the real exit. (man knocks on the door again but holding up a business card |
up) | up) | ||
| − | Squidward: He's got a card. (reading business card) R.A. | + | Squidward: He's got a card. (reading business card) R.A. Penny Pincher: Vending Supplies.<br> |
| − | Mr Krabs: What? My machine has arrived?! Oh, let 'em in, let 'em in, let 'em in.<br> | + | Mr. Krabs: What? My machine has arrived?! Oh, let 'em in, let 'em in, let 'em in.<br> |
| − | R.A. | + | R.A. Penny Pincher: Bring it in boys.<br> |
| − | Mr Krabs: That's it, set her down easy.<br> | + | Mr. Krabs: That's it, set her down easy.<br> |
| − | R.A. | + | R.A. Penny Pincher: Here are the keys, Mr. Krabs. Happy vending!<br> |
Squidward: What is it?<br> | Squidward: What is it?<br> | ||
| − | Mr Krabs: Only the greatest money maker since the krabby patty. Gentlemen, meet "skill crane".<br> | + | Mr. Krabs: Only the greatest money maker since the krabby patty. Gentlemen, meet "skill crane".<br> |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Ooh, skill crane.<br> | |
| − | Mr Krabs: At a quarter a pop, this thing will pay for itself in no time. Which reminds me, step up boys. First one's free. | + | Mr. Krabs: At a quarter a pop, this thing will pay for itself in no time. Which reminds me, step up boys. First one's free. |
(takes out two golden coins)<br> | (takes out two golden coins)<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Thanks, Mr. Krabs. (takes coin)<br> | |
Squidward: No thanks, I'll pass.<br> | Squidward: No thanks, I'll pass.<br> | ||
| − | Mr Krabs: C'mon Squidward, you know you want to.<br> | + | Mr. Krabs: C'mon Squidward, you know you want to.<br> |
Squidward: (sighs) Ok, if you insist. (takes coin and puts it in his pocket) Thanks.<br> | Squidward: (sighs) Ok, if you insist. (takes coin and puts it in his pocket) Thanks.<br> | ||
| − | Mr Krabs: Squidward! In the machine.<br> | + | Mr. Krabs: Squidward! In the machine.<br> |
Squidward: Alright, alright. (puts coin in machine and moves crane) Oh boy, what fun. (crane almost pulls out a dinosaur)<br> | Squidward: Alright, alright. (puts coin in machine and moves crane) Oh boy, what fun. (crane almost pulls out a dinosaur)<br> | ||
| Line 56: | Line 56: | ||
Skill Crane: You lose.<br> | Skill Crane: You lose.<br> | ||
| − | Squidward: Did you see that, | + | Squidward: Did you see that, SpongeBob? I almost got that on my first try!<br> |
| − | Mr Krabs: My work here is done.<br> | + | Mr. Krabs: My work here is done.<br> |
| − | Squidward: They don't call me "Squidward 'Manually Dexterity' Tentacles" for nothing. (moves his tentacles up and down and so does | + | Squidward: They don't call me "Squidward 'Manually Dexterity' Tentacles" for nothing. (moves his tentacles up and down and so does SpongeBob)<br> |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Well, why don't I give it a try.<br> | |
Squidward: Haha, good luck. You'll...<br> | Squidward: Haha, good luck. You'll...<br> | ||
| Line 68: | Line 68: | ||
Skill Crane: Winner!<br> | Skill Crane: Winner!<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: It's a bear. I'm gonna call you 'Beary'.<br> | |
Squidward: Heh, beginner's luck. Now it's the masters turn. (puts another coin in and grabs a cat but the crane drops it) | Squidward: Heh, beginner's luck. Now it's the masters turn. (puts another coin in and grabs a cat but the crane drops it) | ||
| Line 75: | Line 75: | ||
Skill Crane: Loser.<br> | Skill Crane: Loser.<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Wow, Squidward, you flipped him over. That takes an awful amount of skill.<br> | |
Squidward: Well thank you for saying so.<br> | Squidward: Well thank you for saying so.<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Beary says he's getting lonely. Don't worry Beary I'll get you a friend. (enters a coin in the skill crane)<br> | |
Squidward: Ha! If you think you're winning that thing again... | Squidward: Ha! If you think you're winning that thing again... | ||
| Line 84: | Line 84: | ||
Skill Crane: Winner!<br> | Skill Crane: Winner!<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: There ya go, Beary.<br> | |
Squidward: Oh, I loosened that one up for you. You would've never won that without my skill.<br> | Squidward: Oh, I loosened that one up for you. You would've never won that without my skill.<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Wow, thanks for your help, Squidward. (walks off)<br> | |
| − | Squidward: Hmph. I bet I win at this thing I try. Now all I have to do is... (thought bubble with Mr Krabs in it appears | + | Squidward: Hmph. I bet I win at this thing I try. Now all I have to do is... (thought bubble with Mr. Krabs in it appears |
above Squidward)<br> | above Squidward)<br> | ||
| − | Mr Krabs: At a quarter a pop, this thing pays for itself in no time.<br> | + | Mr. Krabs: At a quarter a pop, this thing pays for itself in no time.<br> |
| − | Squidward: Ha! I'm not falling for that | + | Squidward: Ha! I'm not falling for that malarkey. (later, Squidward is behind the register)<br> |
| − | + | SpongeBob: (skill crane makes the sound of a winner. SpongeBob walks by with a blue prize animal from the skill crane) Hey, | |
| − | Squidward. (skill crane makes the sound of a winner. | + | Squidward. (skill crane makes the sound of a winner. SpongeBob walks by with a rabbit from the skill crane) Hey, Squidward. (skill crane makes the sound of a winner. SpongeBob walks by with a two-headed pink prize animal from the skill crane) Hey, |
| − | Squidward. (laughing from the kitchen) Ok, Mrs Wiggles, order up. Beary cooked this one all by himself. Oh, he makes me so | + | Squidward. (laughing from the kitchen) Ok, Mrs. Wiggles, order up. Beary cooked this one all by himself. Oh, he makes me so |
proud.<br> | proud.<br> | ||
| Line 108: | Line 108: | ||
Squidward: (sighs) What the...alright. Let's get this over with.<br> | Squidward: (sighs) What the...alright. Let's get this over with.<br> | ||
| − | Mr Krabs: Need some change? (takes | + | Mr. Krabs: Need some change? (takes Squidward’s dollar and gives him four coins in exchange) There ya are.<br> |
Squidward: Gee, thanks.<br> | Squidward: Gee, thanks.<br> | ||
| − | Mr Krabs: No, no Mr Squidward. Thank you. (Squidward inserts coin in machine)<br> | + | Mr. Krabs: No, no Mr. Squidward. Thank you. (Squidward inserts coin in machine)<br> |
Skill Crane: You lose.<br> | Skill Crane: You lose.<br> | ||
| − | Mr Krabs: Need some more change? (gives Squidward more coins but | + | Mr. Krabs: Need some more change? (gives Squidward more coins but Squidward keeps on losing over and over, dollar after |
dollar)<br> | dollar)<br> | ||
| Line 121: | Line 121: | ||
Skill Crane: You lose.<br> | Skill Crane: You lose.<br> | ||
| − | Mr Krabs: Need some change?<br> | + | Mr. Krabs: Need some change?<br> |
Squidward: No.<br> | Squidward: No.<br> | ||
| − | Mr Krabs: What? Why?<br> | + | Mr. Krabs: What? Why?<br> |
Squidward: Because...I'm all out of money!!<br> | Squidward: Because...I'm all out of money!!<br> | ||
| − | Mr Krabs: All out of...? Hmmm. (later, comes out of his office) Boys, it's payday.<br> | + | Mr. Krabs: All out of...? Hmmm. (later, comes out of his office) Boys, it's payday.<br> |
| − | + | SpongeBob: (gasps) But, Mr Krabs, today is Monday.<br> | |
| − | Mr Krabs: What the...no it's payday me boy.<br> | + | Mr. Krabs: What the...no it's payday me boy.<br> |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Money, money, money, money, money, money.<br> | |
| − | Mr Krabs: I took the liberty of turning your paycheck into quarters. Just in case you wanna, oh I dunno, do laundary, buy a | + | Mr. Krabs: I took the liberty of turning your paycheck into quarters. Just in case you wanna, oh I dunno, do laundary, buy a |
soda or something.<br> | soda or something.<br> | ||
| Line 144: | Line 144: | ||
Narrator: Six hours later...<br> | Narrator: Six hours later...<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: (Squidward sitting on ground with empty bag over head) Pardon me, Squidward. SpongeBear Junior here wants me to | |
| − | win him a little brother. (Squidward scoots to the side while | + | win him a little brother. (Squidward scoots to the side while SpongeBob inserts a coin into the machine)<br> |
Skill Crane: You are a winner. (two prizes come out)<br> | Skill Crane: You are a winner. (two prizes come out)<br> | ||
| Line 151: | Line 151: | ||
Squidward: Huh?<br> | Squidward: Huh?<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Two in one quarter? That's not fair. (puts in one of the prizes) What's that 'frown clown'? You'd rather sit | |
next to the 'lovely lion'? (takes the crane and moves the prizes around) There you are, nice and cozy. See ya later, | next to the 'lovely lion'? (takes the crane and moves the prizes around) There you are, nice and cozy. See ya later, | ||
Squidward.<br> | Squidward.<br> | ||
| − | Squidward: (scoots his way into his house and then sits on his couch) A little mind-numbing television ought to help me forget about that stupid machine. (tries to pick up the remote but | + | Squidward: (scoots his way into his house and then sits on his couch) A little mind-numbing television ought to help me forget about that stupid machine. (tries to pick up the remote but every time he tries, he fails. Uses his eye instead) |
Yeow!! (now in bed) You had a rough day, Squiddy. But that doesn't mean tomorrow won't be better. (tries to pull his covers | Yeow!! (now in bed) You had a rough day, Squiddy. But that doesn't mean tomorrow won't be better. (tries to pull his covers | ||
but he can't) Ooh, phooey! (tries to pick up the glass of water by his bed but drops it and breaks it) I gotta win that | but he can't) Ooh, phooey! (tries to pick up the glass of water by his bed but drops it and breaks it) I gotta win that | ||
| − | crane! (runs through his closet door and gets the piggy bank. Later, | + | crane! (runs through his closet door and gets the piggy bank. Later, SpongeBob enters the Krusty Krab and freaks out at |
what he sees when he enters) Just once. Please, oh please, let me win one time.<br> | what he sees when he enters) Just once. Please, oh please, let me win one time.<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Squid, I think you have a problem.<br> | |
| − | Mr Krabs: No he doesn't. You don't listen to him, Squidward. You keep playing until you win! (takes out all the quarters | + | Mr. Krabs: No he doesn't. You don't listen to him, Squidward. You keep playing until you win! (takes out all the quarters |
that were put in the machine and pours them into a bucket. A piece of rolled paper drops into the bucket) What's this?<br> | that were put in the machine and pours them into a bucket. A piece of rolled paper drops into the bucket) What's this?<br> | ||
Squidward: The deed to my house.<br> | Squidward: The deed to my house.<br> | ||
| − | Mr Krabs: Okie dokie then. Carry on.<br> | + | Mr. Krabs: Okie dokie then. Carry on.<br> |
Squidward: (cries) If I can just win once, I'd never play again.<br> | Squidward: (cries) If I can just win once, I'd never play again.<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Hey, you want me to tell you the secret of how to win on this machine.<br> | |
| − | Squidward: (gasps) | + | Squidward: (gasps) SpongeBob, there's a secret?<br> |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Mm-hmm.<br> | |
Squidward: Tell me the secret.<br> | Squidward: Tell me the secret.<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Are you ready to be a winner?<br> | |
Squidward: Yes.<br> | Squidward: Yes.<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Yeah?<br> | |
Squidward: Yeah.<br> | Squidward: Yeah.<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Yes?<br> | |
Squidward: Yes.<br> | Squidward: Yes.<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Yes?<br> | |
| − | Squidward: | + | Squidward: SpongeBob! The secret?<br> |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Ok, Squidward, ok. I face the crane. Deposit my quarter. Then I close my eyes.<br> | |
Squidward: Close your eyes?<br> | Squidward: Close your eyes?<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Quiet, Squidward. I'm being the crane.<br> | |
Squidward: Oh, that's...<br> | Squidward: Oh, that's...<br> | ||
| Line 205: | Line 205: | ||
Skill Crane: Winner!<br> | Skill Crane: Winner!<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: See? Now you try.<br> | |
Squidward: This is ridiculous. If I close my eyes, how will I know where the...<br> | Squidward: This is ridiculous. If I close my eyes, how will I know where the...<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Squidward, do you wanna win or not?<br> | |
Squidward: (presses face against machine) Yesssss. Yes, I do.<br> | Squidward: (presses face against machine) Yesssss. Yes, I do.<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Ok, Squidward, put your quarter in.<br> | |
Squidward: But, this is my last quarter.<br> | Squidward: But, this is my last quarter.<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: In the machine, Squidward.<br> | |
Squidward: Ok-ok.<br> | Squidward: Ok-ok.<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Close your eyes. (Squidward does) Now be the crane. (while SpongeBob is telling him this, Squidward is playing | |
the game) Be the crane. Be the crane. Be the crane.<br> | the game) Be the crane. Be the crane. Be the crane.<br> | ||
| Line 228: | Line 228: | ||
Squidward: Whoo-hoo! Yeah! I knew I could do it. I'm a winner.<br> | Squidward: Whoo-hoo! Yeah! I knew I could do it. I'm a winner.<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: You're a winner.<br> | |
| − | Squidward: I am a winner, aren't I? Winner, winner, winner! (twirls) Winner. (over loud-speaker) I'm a winner everybody. You hear that? (cricket chirps due to the empty restaurant. Squidward goes into Mr Krabs office) I'm a winner.<br> | + | Squidward: I am a winner, aren't I? Winner, winner, winner! (twirls) Winner. (over loud-speaker) I'm a winner everybody. You hear that? (cricket chirps due to the empty restaurant. Squidward goes into Mr. Krabs office) I'm a winner.<br> |
| − | Mr Krabs: That's funny. Last time I checked you were a cashier.<br> | + | Mr. Krabs: That's funny. Last time I checked you were a cashier.<br> |
| − | Squidward: Yuk it up all you want, Mr Krabs. But just remember, you're | + | Squidward: Yuk it up all you want, Mr. Krabs. But just remember, you're yoking (looking) it up in front of a winner. Ha!<br> |
| − | Mr Krabs: I'll try to remember that. 3,498 of Squidward's quarters. 3,499 of Squidward's quarters.<br> | + | Mr. Krabs: I'll try to remember that. 3,498 of Squidward's quarters. 3,499 of Squidward's quarters.<br> |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Triple decker, on deck.<br> | |
| − | Squidward: (slams door in | + | Squidward: (slams door in SpongeBob face) Make way for the winner. (door opens to SpongeBob having the triple decker |
hanging out of his mouth like an accordion)<br> | hanging out of his mouth like an accordion)<br> | ||
| Line 254: | Line 254: | ||
Squidward: It means you have no skills and you're a loser! (laughs) I'm a winner, see my prize. You're a loser who sits and | Squidward: It means you have no skills and you're a loser! (laughs) I'm a winner, see my prize. You're a loser who sits and | ||
| − | cries. (little kids kicks Squidward in the leg) Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. (later, Squidward and | + | cries. (little kids kicks Squidward in the leg) Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. (later, Squidward and SpongeBob are walking out the |
Krusty Krab) Did you see how I handled that crane?<br> | Krusty Krab) Did you see how I handled that crane?<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: I sure did.<br> | |
Squidward: I just closed my eyes and became the crane.<br> | Squidward: I just closed my eyes and became the crane.<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Oh, yeah, you're the man.<br> | |
| − | Squidward: | + | Squidward: SpongeBob, look. (a real crane is just a few yards away. Squidward runs to it)<br> |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Uhh, Squidward I don't think the same principles apply.<br> | |
Squidward: Be the crane.<br> | Squidward: Be the crane.<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Wait, Squidward!<br> | |
Squidward: Be the crane. (picks up an I-beam)<br> | Squidward: Be the crane. (picks up an I-beam)<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: He did it. Yay, Squidward!<br> | |
Squidward: Be the crane. Be the crane. Be the...<br> | Squidward: Be the crane. Be the crane. Be the...<br> | ||
| Line 278: | Line 278: | ||
Construction Worker: You know this guy?<br> | Construction Worker: You know this guy?<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Yeah, that's Squidward. He's got the magic touch. (pokes the construction worker) Ding. (Squidward knocks a | |
bunch of buildings over with the I-beam) Tada! (notices the mess) Ah! Squidward, open your eyes.<br> | bunch of buildings over with the I-beam) Tada! (notices the mess) Ah! Squidward, open your eyes.<br> | ||
| − | Squidward: (opens eyes) Oh, uhh, be the crane. Be the crane. (can't control crane) Look out, | + | Squidward: (opens eyes) Oh, uhh, be the crane. Be the crane. (can't control crane) Look out, SpongeBob. I can't stop! |
| − | (crane chases after | + | (crane chases after SpongeBob & workers) Be the crane. Be the crane. Be the crane. Don't be the crane. Don't be the crane. |
(crane spins around fast and heads towards the Krusty Krab destroying it)<br> | (crane spins around fast and heads towards the Krusty Krab destroying it)<br> | ||
| − | Mr Krabs: What the...?<br> | + | Mr. Krabs: What the...?<br> |
Squidward: Oh my. Oh my. Time to go, Teddy. (bumps into large construction worker)<br> | Squidward: Oh my. Oh my. Time to go, Teddy. (bumps into large construction worker)<br> | ||
| Line 293: | Line 293: | ||
Construction Worker #2: You ain't going anywhere.<br> | Construction Worker #2: You ain't going anywhere.<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: (whistles) Hang on, buddy. I got ya. (uses crane to get Squidward but instead gets his prize) I guess I can only | |
pick up toys.<br> | pick up toys.<br> | ||
Revision as of 13:28, 14 April 2008
| Back Episode Transcript | Next Episode Transcript |
|---|---|
| Have You Seen This Snail? | Good Neighbors |
Episode Article: Skill Crane
Characters
(Outside the Krusty Krab, a man is knocking on the doors)
Squidward: Mr. Krabs, some guy in a suit wants to come in before we open.
Mr. Krabs: What? Guy in a suit? No, it's a tax collector! (jumps inside SpongeBob) Hide us, SpongeBob! (takes the register in with him) We'll just walk non-schelauntly to the real exit. (man knocks on the door again but holding up a business card up)
Squidward: He's got a card. (reading business card) R.A. Penny Pincher: Vending Supplies.
Mr. Krabs: What? My machine has arrived?! Oh, let 'em in, let 'em in, let 'em in.
R.A. Penny Pincher: Bring it in boys.
Mr. Krabs: That's it, set her down easy.
R.A. Penny Pincher: Here are the keys, Mr. Krabs. Happy vending!
Squidward: What is it?
Mr. Krabs: Only the greatest money maker since the krabby patty. Gentlemen, meet "skill crane".
SpongeBob: Ooh, skill crane.
Mr. Krabs: At a quarter a pop, this thing will pay for itself in no time. Which reminds me, step up boys. First one's free.
(takes out two golden coins)
SpongeBob: Thanks, Mr. Krabs. (takes coin)
Squidward: No thanks, I'll pass.
Mr. Krabs: C'mon Squidward, you know you want to.
Squidward: (sighs) Ok, if you insist. (takes coin and puts it in his pocket) Thanks.
Mr. Krabs: Squidward! In the machine.
Squidward: Alright, alright. (puts coin in machine and moves crane) Oh boy, what fun. (crane almost pulls out a dinosaur)
Skill Crane: You lose.
Squidward: Did you see that, SpongeBob? I almost got that on my first try!
Mr. Krabs: My work here is done.
Squidward: They don't call me "Squidward 'Manually Dexterity' Tentacles" for nothing. (moves his tentacles up and down and so does SpongeBob)
SpongeBob: Well, why don't I give it a try.
Squidward: Haha, good luck. You'll...
Skill Crane: Winner!
SpongeBob: It's a bear. I'm gonna call you 'Beary'.
Squidward: Heh, beginner's luck. Now it's the masters turn. (puts another coin in and grabs a cat but the crane drops it)
Skill Crane: Loser.
SpongeBob: Wow, Squidward, you flipped him over. That takes an awful amount of skill.
Squidward: Well thank you for saying so.
SpongeBob: Beary says he's getting lonely. Don't worry Beary I'll get you a friend. (enters a coin in the skill crane)
Squidward: Ha! If you think you're winning that thing again...
Skill Crane: Winner!
SpongeBob: There ya go, Beary.
Squidward: Oh, I loosened that one up for you. You would've never won that without my skill.
SpongeBob: Wow, thanks for your help, Squidward. (walks off)
Squidward: Hmph. I bet I win at this thing I try. Now all I have to do is... (thought bubble with Mr. Krabs in it appears
above Squidward)
Mr. Krabs: At a quarter a pop, this thing pays for itself in no time.
Squidward: Ha! I'm not falling for that malarkey. (later, Squidward is behind the register)
SpongeBob: (skill crane makes the sound of a winner. SpongeBob walks by with a blue prize animal from the skill crane) Hey,
Squidward. (skill crane makes the sound of a winner. SpongeBob walks by with a rabbit from the skill crane) Hey, Squidward. (skill crane makes the sound of a winner. SpongeBob walks by with a two-headed pink prize animal from the skill crane) Hey,
Squidward. (laughing from the kitchen) Ok, Mrs. Wiggles, order up. Beary cooked this one all by himself. Oh, he makes me so
proud.
Skill Crane: (distinct scratchy voice) Squid-ward. (crane swinging back and forth) Squid-ward.
Squidward: (sighs) What the...alright. Let's get this over with.
Mr. Krabs: Need some change? (takes Squidward’s dollar and gives him four coins in exchange) There ya are.
Squidward: Gee, thanks.
Mr. Krabs: No, no Mr. Squidward. Thank you. (Squidward inserts coin in machine)
Skill Crane: You lose.
Mr. Krabs: Need some more change? (gives Squidward more coins but Squidward keeps on losing over and over, dollar after
dollar)
Skill Crane: You lose.
Mr. Krabs: Need some change?
Squidward: No.
Mr. Krabs: What? Why?
Squidward: Because...I'm all out of money!!
Mr. Krabs: All out of...? Hmmm. (later, comes out of his office) Boys, it's payday.
SpongeBob: (gasps) But, Mr Krabs, today is Monday.
Mr. Krabs: What the...no it's payday me boy.
SpongeBob: Money, money, money, money, money, money.
Mr. Krabs: I took the liberty of turning your paycheck into quarters. Just in case you wanna, oh I dunno, do laundary, buy a
soda or something.
Squidward: Very funny, Mr Krabs. If I can't win one of those stupid things with (this) quater, I'm walking away.
Narrator: Six hours later...
SpongeBob: (Squidward sitting on ground with empty bag over head) Pardon me, Squidward. SpongeBear Junior here wants me to
win him a little brother. (Squidward scoots to the side while SpongeBob inserts a coin into the machine)
Skill Crane: You are a winner. (two prizes come out)
Squidward: Huh?
SpongeBob: Two in one quarter? That's not fair. (puts in one of the prizes) What's that 'frown clown'? You'd rather sit
next to the 'lovely lion'? (takes the crane and moves the prizes around) There you are, nice and cozy. See ya later,
Squidward.
Squidward: (scoots his way into his house and then sits on his couch) A little mind-numbing television ought to help me forget about that stupid machine. (tries to pick up the remote but every time he tries, he fails. Uses his eye instead)
Yeow!! (now in bed) You had a rough day, Squiddy. But that doesn't mean tomorrow won't be better. (tries to pull his covers
but he can't) Ooh, phooey! (tries to pick up the glass of water by his bed but drops it and breaks it) I gotta win that
crane! (runs through his closet door and gets the piggy bank. Later, SpongeBob enters the Krusty Krab and freaks out at
what he sees when he enters) Just once. Please, oh please, let me win one time.
SpongeBob: Squid, I think you have a problem.
Mr. Krabs: No he doesn't. You don't listen to him, Squidward. You keep playing until you win! (takes out all the quarters
that were put in the machine and pours them into a bucket. A piece of rolled paper drops into the bucket) What's this?
Squidward: The deed to my house.
Mr. Krabs: Okie dokie then. Carry on.
Squidward: (cries) If I can just win once, I'd never play again.
SpongeBob: Hey, you want me to tell you the secret of how to win on this machine.
Squidward: (gasps) SpongeBob, there's a secret?
SpongeBob: Mm-hmm.
Squidward: Tell me the secret.
SpongeBob: Are you ready to be a winner?
Squidward: Yes.
SpongeBob: Yeah?
Squidward: Yeah.
SpongeBob: Yes?
Squidward: Yes.
SpongeBob: Yes?
Squidward: SpongeBob! The secret?
SpongeBob: Ok, Squidward, ok. I face the crane. Deposit my quarter. Then I close my eyes.
Squidward: Close your eyes?
SpongeBob: Quiet, Squidward. I'm being the crane.
Squidward: Oh, that's...
Skill Crane: Winner!
SpongeBob: See? Now you try.
Squidward: This is ridiculous. If I close my eyes, how will I know where the...
SpongeBob: Squidward, do you wanna win or not?
Squidward: (presses face against machine) Yesssss. Yes, I do.
SpongeBob: Ok, Squidward, put your quarter in.
Squidward: But, this is my last quarter.
SpongeBob: In the machine, Squidward.
Squidward: Ok-ok.
SpongeBob: Close your eyes. (Squidward does) Now be the crane. (while SpongeBob is telling him this, Squidward is playing
the game) Be the crane. Be the crane. Be the crane.
Skill Crane: Winner!
Squidward: Whoo-hoo! Yeah! I knew I could do it. I'm a winner.
SpongeBob: You're a winner.
Squidward: I am a winner, aren't I? Winner, winner, winner! (twirls) Winner. (over loud-speaker) I'm a winner everybody. You hear that? (cricket chirps due to the empty restaurant. Squidward goes into Mr. Krabs office) I'm a winner.
Mr. Krabs: That's funny. Last time I checked you were a cashier.
Squidward: Yuk it up all you want, Mr. Krabs. But just remember, you're yoking (looking) it up in front of a winner. Ha!
Mr. Krabs: I'll try to remember that. 3,498 of Squidward's quarters. 3,499 of Squidward's quarters.
SpongeBob: Triple decker, on deck.
Squidward: (slams door in SpongeBob face) Make way for the winner. (door opens to SpongeBob having the triple decker
hanging out of his mouth like an accordion)
Skill Crane: You lose. (little kid sighs)
Squidward: You didn't win the prize?
Billy: No.
Squidward: You know what that means?
Billy: No, what?
Squidward: It means you have no skills and you're a loser! (laughs) I'm a winner, see my prize. You're a loser who sits and
cries. (little kids kicks Squidward in the leg) Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. (later, Squidward and SpongeBob are walking out the
Krusty Krab) Did you see how I handled that crane?
SpongeBob: I sure did.
Squidward: I just closed my eyes and became the crane.
SpongeBob: Oh, yeah, you're the man.
Squidward: SpongeBob, look. (a real crane is just a few yards away. Squidward runs to it)
SpongeBob: Uhh, Squidward I don't think the same principles apply.
Squidward: Be the crane.
SpongeBob: Wait, Squidward!
Squidward: Be the crane. (picks up an I-beam)
SpongeBob: He did it. Yay, Squidward!
Squidward: Be the crane. Be the crane. Be the...
Construction Worker: You know this guy?
SpongeBob: Yeah, that's Squidward. He's got the magic touch. (pokes the construction worker) Ding. (Squidward knocks a
bunch of buildings over with the I-beam) Tada! (notices the mess) Ah! Squidward, open your eyes.
Squidward: (opens eyes) Oh, uhh, be the crane. Be the crane. (can't control crane) Look out, SpongeBob. I can't stop!
(crane chases after SpongeBob & workers) Be the crane. Be the crane. Be the crane. Don't be the crane. Don't be the crane.
(crane spins around fast and heads towards the Krusty Krab destroying it)
Mr. Krabs: What the...?
Squidward: Oh my. Oh my. Time to go, Teddy. (bumps into large construction worker)
Construction Worker: Just where do you think you're going, crane master?
Construction Worker #2: You ain't going anywhere.
SpongeBob: (whistles) Hang on, buddy. I got ya. (uses crane to get Squidward but instead gets his prize) I guess I can only
pick up toys.
Squidward: Uh-oh.
