Episode Transcript: Waiting

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Episode Article: Waiting

Characters

Dialogue

Barg 'n Mart

(at the Barg'n Mart, SpongeBob is whistling while putting a box of Kelp cereal in his shopping cart)

SpongeBob: What's this? (reads box label) It says free prize! (braying laughter. Takes Gary and his box of cereal home and immediately dumps out all the cereal in the bowl and munches it all down) Huh? Where's my prize? (reads cereal box again) "Free Prize." (gasps) "Offer inside"! Just send in 99 box tops!

Inside SpongeBob's Kitchen

(cut to SpongeBob eating more cereal with a bunch of cereal boxes all around him)

How you doing over there, Gary?

Gary: Meow. (SpongeBob opens up a box and pours the cereal in Gary's bowl) Meow.

SpongeBob: Send in the box tops... (swallows the cereal in his mouth) ...before eating all the cereal?! Gary, you are a genius! (cut to SpongeBob stuffing the envelopes with box tops. Cut to SpongeBob outside by the mailbox) I'm waiting. I'm waiting.

Outside SpongeBob's pineapple

SpongeBob & Patrick: I'm waiting. I'm waiting. We're waiting. We're waiting.

SpongeBob: We're waiting.

Patrick: SpongeBob, what are we waiting for?

SpongeBob: We're waiting for the mailman. He's bringing me a free toy.

Patrick: I love toys! Can I wait for your toy with you?

SpongeBob: Why, sure.

SpongeBob & Patrick: We're waiting. We're waiting.

Patrick: There's the mailman!

Mailman: Are you SpongeBob SquarePants?

SpongeBob: Yup. (shuddering with excitement. Mailman hands him 3 envelopes) Isn't there anything else?

Mailman: Nope, sorry kid. (walks off whistling)

SpongeBob: Guess we'll have to keep waiting. (both wait by the mailbox. After a while, both of their stomachs growl and bark at each other)

Patrick: Hey, SpongeBob, I'm hungry.

SpongeBob: Me, too.

Patrick: Let's go down to the Krusty Krab for a Krabby Patty.

SpongeBob: Great idea, Patrick. Krusty Krab, here we... wait a minute. What if the mailman comes when I'm gone? (clings onto the mailbox)

Patrick: What's wrong SpongeBob?

SpongeBob: If I leave, the mailman might come and I might miss him.

Patrick: Oh, I'm gonna take off then. I don't think my arm can stand much more of this. (Patrick's stomach is biting his arm)

SpongeBob: (checks mailbox) Got to stay focused. (checks mailbox again. Sandy jumps in)

Sandy: Hiya! Hey, SpongeBob, want to do some kara...!! (SpongeBob grabs her arm and flips her on her back)

SpongeBob: Not now, I'm busy. (Sandy brushes herself off and walks away. SpongeBob checks the mailbox again. Gary pushes his bowl by SpongeBob’s foot) Oh, Gary, not now. Can't you see that I'm waiting for the mailman?! Doesn't anyone understand this?!? (checks mailbox again then pants as Gary takes his bowl away) So tired. So hungry. But must wait...for toy.

Patrick: Hey, buddy.

SpongeBob: (screaming): What!?! What do you want?! Can't you see I'm doing something here?! (pokes patrick in the head, checks mailbox) This better be good.

Patrick: You missed your surprise birthday party, so I just wanted to bring you a present and some cake because you missed it.

SpongeBob: My birthday party? I missed my birthday party?

Patrick: Yeah, see? (shows present and cake) Here's a present and your cake.

SpongeBob: My birthday cake.

Patrick: Yeah. Let me just get you a fork so you can eat it. (SpongeBob giggles) Uh, let me just hold the cake like this, (holds the piece of cake between his teeth) so I can get you a fork. (digs in pocket) Huh, I wonder where I put that fork. (notices he ate the cake) Oops.

SpongeBob: That was my cake. What is the present?

Patrick: Oh, yeah. (opens the box) A fork! (SpongeBob sniffles, then cries loudly)

SpongeBob: That stupid toy! I wasted my whole life waiting for it!

Patrick: Actually, you've only been here 20 minutes.

SpongeBob: I've been mean to Gary and I flipped Sandy, and now you hate me 'cause... I'm a big jerk! (cries)

Patrick: No, I don't.

SpongeBob: Yes, you do.

Mailman: SpongeBob SquarePants?

Patrick: Could you come back later? He's having a moment.

Mailman: Yeah. I just need a signature for...

Patrick: I said he's having a moment! Now leave him alone!

SpongeBob: No, Patrick, (sniff), people like me don't deserve moments. (signs for the package) I get so caught up in... Oh, here ya go. (takes package) ...in waiting for my...my toy! (laughs. Patrick laughs) Whoo!

Patrick: Whoo! Yeah! (both riverdance, laugh and dance on the ground. Spongebob opens up the package to reveal a green-headed, purple-colored body toy)

SpongeBob: Patrick, are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Patrick: Yup.

SpongeBob & Patrick: It's beautiful. (Patrick touches it and its springs pop out)

Patrick: SpongeBob?

SpongeBob: I waited so long...

Patrick: SpongeBob?

SpongeBob: And you broke it...

Patrick: You okay, buddy?

SpongeBob: Yes, yes I'm okay.

Patrick: (sighs) For a sec, I...

SpongeBob: You! You ruined my free toy!

Patrick: I'm sorry. Oh, maybe if you just... (pokes it but the springs stretch out. SpongeBob screams and Patrick cries. Squidward walks down the street while SpongeBob and Patrick are rolling around crying)

Outside Squidward's Easter Island Head

Squidward: Just keep walking, Squiddy. don't make eye contact. (walks into his house, goes upstairs to look out the window and see SpongeBob & Patrick still crying, then closes his window) Ah, now to soothe my frayed nerves. (crying resume in louder outcome. Squidward walks out of his house) All right, what's going on? Why are you two crying?

SpongeBob: (stuttering): I-I ate... box-box-box tops. And then... I'm waiting. I'm waiting. And then he came and we're waiting. We're waiting. And finally I flipped Sandy. I was mean to Gary. Patrick hates me, I misses my birthday and then my toy and then you and then snap and then this.

Patrick: (stops crying): But I-I-I do have to poke the strings. (shows toy, SpongeBob still cries. Squidward fixes it by pushing its head down)

Squidward: There. Now see? (shows how the toy works) It's supposed to do that.

SpongeBob: Hey, my toy's okay!

Squidward: Good. Now will you two be quiet?

SpongeBob: Look, Patrick, Squidward fixed it. (both run over and hug Squidward) How can we ever thank you?

Patrick: Yeah, how can we thank you? (giggles)

Squidward: Move to another neighborhood.

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