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Editing Episode Transcript: The Lost Mattress
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==Characters== | ==Characters== | ||
| − | *[[ | + | *[[SpongeBob]] |
| − | *[[ | + | *[[Patrick]] |
| − | *[[ | + | *[[Squidward]] |
| − | *[[ | + | *[[Mr. Krabs]] |
| − | + | ||
==Dialogue== | ==Dialogue== | ||
| − | |||
| − | + | (Squidward's watch strikes 9 o'clock)<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: Wow, this time I'm really late again. Maybe he'll finally fire me. (laughs as he walks into the closed front doors of the | |
| + | Krusty Krab) Locked?<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: This isn't happening. This isn't happening.<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: SpongeBob is that you?<br> | |
| − | '''Squidward: | + | SpongeBob: The horror. It's unspeakable. Don't you see, Squidward? It's closed! The Krusty Krab is closed!<br> |
| + | Squidward: You mean I got out of bed for nothing?<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: The doors are locked. The doors are locked and we are on the outside. Outsiders. What are we going to do, | |
| + | Squidward? There are Krabby Patties inside. All alone.<br> | ||
| − | + | Mr. Krabs: Just stand aside, lad, and let me unlock the door but my back is killing like pain.<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: (faces comes out his backside) Mr. Krabs, you're here! (jumping around) Gosh, Mr. Krabs, we were worried something | |
| + | might have happened to you. That the world would've never been deprived of the greatest food known to man.<br> | ||
| − | + | Mr. Krabs: (drops his keys) Oh, you made me drop me keys. Give me some space, lad. Can't a crab get a little space now?<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: (cries) I'm sorry, Mr. Krabs.<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: Harsh. (laughs)<br> | |
| + | Mr. Krabs: (breaks his back) Arrgh, me back!<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Are you hurt, Mr. Krabs?<br> | |
| − | + | Mr. Krabs: No, I'm just doubled over in pain, fightin back tears in me eyes because it's a new dance craze.<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Oh good, I thought you were hurt.<br> | |
| − | ''' | + | Mr. Krabs: I am hurt, ya idiot! (SpongeBob cries) I'm sorry I snapped at ya, laddie. It's just me back is killing me. It's me |
| + | old, lumpy mattress. It's like trying to sleep on broken coral. I'm going out of me mind. (back breaks again) Oh, me back. | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Poor Mr. Krabs. What are we going to do, Squidward? | |
| + | Squidward: Why do anything? I like the new Mr. Krabs. He yells at you more. (laughs)<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: I'm serious, Squidward.<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: So am I.<br> | |
| + | SpongeBob: We should get Mr Krabs a new mattress and surprise him with it as a gift. Then we'll never have to be late to | ||
| + | work again.<br> | ||
| − | + | Squidward: What? You want me to spend my hard earned money on my own now you exuse me will you lease i am saying to mr krabs to me that i am 'richer than me' skin Flynn boss? No, thank you. (enters | |
| − | + | Krusty Krab)<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: That's ok, Squidward, you'll warm up to the idea. (later) Thanks for coming with me, Patrick.<br> | |
| + | Patrick: No problem, buddy. I always wanted to go to a mattress store. (both enter store and gasp)<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: I've never seen so many mattress.<br> | |
| − | + | Patrick: Yeah.<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: How many do you think there are?<br> | |
| − | + | Patrick: (looks around and thinks) 10.<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Cool.<br> | |
| − | + | Employee: There's plenty more than that. Try them out. Find one you like. (SpongeBob jumps on a mattress but Patrick shakes his head. Patrick lays down on a mattress but sinks into it as SpongeBob shakes his head. SpongeBob falls on his back on a rock-hard mattress. Patrick sits in a racecar bed then a crashing sound is heard. SpongeBob sits on a bunch of needles and the employee holds up a first-aid kit. Finally, Patrick sits on a mattress that rotates in rolling from side to side. Now back at the Krusty Krab where SpongeBob and Patrick are laughing)<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: What are you morons doing in the restaurant?<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Making a card for Mr. Krabs. To go with his new mattress.<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: Oh, I see. You're just kissing up to the boss to make me look bad. Well, I won't stand for it. Gimme that card. | |
| + | (signs card) Trying to outsmart me, will ya? (licks envelope) There, I signed it for all of us.<br> | ||
| − | + | Patrick: Hey, you didn't even help pay.<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Oh, that's OK, as long as Mr. Krabs is happy with his new mattress. (later at Mr. Krabs house)<br> | |
| − | + | Mr. Krabs: Oh, me back. Well, here goes another useless attempt to sleep on me mountainous, lumpy mattress. (lays on his mattress) Huh, that's queer. Me mattress seems strangely cozy and butter...like... (falls asleep)<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob, Patrick & Squidward: Surprise!<br> | |
| − | + | Mr. Krabs: What? Oh, you? What in the blue-eyed scallop are you doing in me bedroom?<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: We noticed how miserable you were on your lumpy, old mattress.<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: So I suggested we get you a new one which is perfect for your bedroom and you never ever be late again.<br> | |
| − | + | Patrick: (talking to SpongeBob) I thought it was your idea.<br> | |
| − | + | Mr. Krabs: (attempting to hold down fury) So, where's me old mattress then?<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: Don't worry, Mr. Krabs, I took care of that personally, too. I had it hauled away to the dump.<br> | |
| − | + | Mr. Krabs: (jumps on Squidward) All...my...money...was...in that mattress!<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: What?! Haven't you ever heard of a bank?!<br> | |
| − | + | Mr. Krabs: Noooooooooooo!<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Mr. Krabs!<br> | |
| − | + | Mr. Krabs: Noooooooooooo! (faints)<br> | |
| − | + | Patrick: And we got you a card.<br> | |
| − | + | Mr. Krabs: Is there money in it?<br> | |
| − | + | Patrick: (shakes the envelope) Nope. (Mr. Krabs faints again. Later, at the hospital)<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Is it serious, doctor? Will Mr. Krabs be alright?<br> | |
| − | + | Doctor: Mr. Krabs is in a "cash coma". Only the return of his money can save his life.<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: It was SpongeBob’s fault! Getting Mr. Krabs a new mattress was his idea!<br> | |
| − | + | Patrick: I knew it!<br> | |
| − | + | Police Officer: Not so fast! (holds up get well card) This card says 'This was all my idea. Love, Squid-ward'. If Mr. Krabs | |
| + | doesn't pull through, you're going to jail!<br> | ||
| − | + | Squidward: Ooh...you did this, SquarePants! If you don't get Mr. Krabs mattress back, I'm going to murd... (officer clears | |
| + | throat) ....help you do it myself without help.<br> | ||
| − | + | Patrick: Wow, he really do es care.<br> | |
| − | + | (later at the dump)<br> | |
| − | + | Patrick: What a dump.<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: We gotta get in there, Squidward. Mr. Krabs is counting on us.<br> | |
| − | + | Patrick: Hey, SpongeBob, isn't that the mattress over there?<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Terrific, Patrick, you found it!<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: What? Where? Lemme see. Where?<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: There it is Squidward, underneath that really big guard worm.<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: Oh, that figures.<br> | |
| − | + | (later at the hospital)<br> | |
| − | + | Doctor: Oh, no. This is terrible. This can't be right.<br> | |
| − | + | Nurse: What is it, doctor?<br> | |
| − | + | Doctor: This man has no insurance.<br> | |
| − | + | Nurse: He'll never be able to afford this room!<br> | |
| − | + | Doctor: You're right, nurse. Extract the patient to the hallway. Stat! (Mr. Krabs is pushed into a snack machine)<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Well, that's Mr. Krabs mattress, alright. Let's go get it.<br> | |
| − | ' | + | Squidward: Ok, here's the plan: you two quietly go in there, remove the mattress out from the guard worm without waking the |
| + | worm.<br> | ||
| − | + | Patrick: Why not?<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Because that would be rude, Patrick.<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: And nothing's meaner than a junkyard worm. He'll eat you alive!<br> | |
| − | + | Patrick: Hey, wait a minute, what are you gonna do?<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: Oh, I've got the most important job. I'm going to keep watch to make sure it's safe.<br> | |
| − | + | Patrick: Gee, thanks buddy.<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: My pleasure.<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: (Patrick climbs the fence) Ah, isn't it beautiful, Patrick? You can see everything from up here.<br> | |
| − | + | Patrick: Wow. (both sigh)<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: What are you doing in your sparetime?<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Hey Patrick, I think I can see our houses from here. | |
| − | + | Patrick: Where? I can't see them. (fence flips around to where Squidward is inside and SpongeBob & Patrick are outside)<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob & Patrick: Wow. (both laugh)<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: What did you idiots do?<br> | |
| − | + | Patrick: Squidward, what are you going in there? You were suppose to keep watch.<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Yeah and you woke up the guard worm, too.<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: I didn't do it! You blockheads woke...the...worm.<br> | |
| − | + | (later at the hospital)<br> | |
| − | + | Doctor #2: Doctor?<br> | |
| − | + | Doctor #1: Yes, doctor?<br> | |
| − | + | Doctor #2: Regarding your patient, doctor. I have come to this conclusion.<br> | |
| − | + | Doctor #1: Yes, go on.<br> | |
| − | + | Doctor #2: We have to surgically remove him out from in front of the candy machine so we can get to the nutty nut bar .<br> | |
| − | + | Doctor #1: Of course. Nurse?<br> | |
| − | + | Nurse: I'm on it. (wheels Mr Krabs outside the hospital) | |
| − | + | (later at the dump)<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: (climbing down a rope with Patrick to get inside the gate) Worm bait to the retriever. Worm bait to the | |
| + | retriever. We're in. Out.<br> | ||
| − | + | Squidward: Retriever to worm bait, stay in. Don't go out.<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Understood. Out.<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: No. In. Out.<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Understood. Out.<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: Oh, look, you're at the far side of the dump, right?<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Affirmative.<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: Good. Then make lots of noise to draw the guard worm away from the mattress so I can retrieve it.<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Affirmative. Out. Oh, that's why he calls himself the retriever.<br> | |
| − | + | Patrick: Why are we called worm bait?<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: I dunno. (ululating with Patrick. Then both uses pots and pans to make loud noises that draws the guard worm | |
| + | away)<br> | ||
| − | + | Squidward: And my perfect plan falls into place. (laughs)<br> | |
| − | + | Patrick: Uhh, SpongeBob?<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Yes, Patrick?<br> | |
| − | + | Patrick: I think I know why our code name is worm bait. (guard worm rushes up and growls at them both until it notices the | |
| + | wooden spoon in SpongeBob’s hand)<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Nice worm. Good, kind, gentle worm. (worms eyes turn into an image of the wooden spoon)<br> | |
| − | + | Patrick: Ohh, SpongeBob, he likes your wooden spoon.<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: (SpongeBob raises the spoon then lowers the spoon as the worms eyes follow where the spoon is) Wow, I think | |
| + | you're right, Patrick.<br> | ||
| − | + | Patrick: See if he plays catch.<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Ok, see the stick boy? (throws spoon) Go get it, boy! (worm chases after spoon)<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: Coast is clear. Squiddy, you are a genius. (wooden spoon hits Squidward in the head) Ouch. What the...? Hey, I | |
| + | needed a wooden spoon. I'll just keep it safe from harm in my back pocket. (places spoon in back pocket) And now for the | ||
| + | mattress. (worm bites Squidward in the butt) I should've guessed. (worm attacks Squidward)<br> | ||
| − | + | (back at the hospital)<br> | |
| − | + | Administrator Flotsam: Excuse me, doctor.<br> | |
| − | + | Doctor: Administrator Flotsam, what can I do for you?<br> | |
| − | + | Administrator Flotsam: It has come to my attention that your patient, Mr. Krabs, is out on the front sidewalk.<br> | |
| − | + | Doctor: Yes. Yes he is.<br> | |
| − | + | Administrator Flotsam: Well, what were you thinking, man? We're trying to run a business here. We can't leave patients on the | |
| + | sidewalk.<br> | ||
| − | + | Doctor: Not to worry. Nurse!<br> | |
| − | + | Nurse: I'm on it. (pushes Mr. Krabs away from the hospital) | |
| − | + | (back at the dump)<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: Alright, you two, what's the holdup?<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: We feel silly.<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: Come on. Do it for old man Krabs.<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Ok. (SpongeBob & Patrick jump out of the portable potty in steak costumes) Can you explain the plan again, | |
| + | Squidward?<br> | ||
| − | + | Squidward: Sure, but first, put on this cologne.<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: (reads label) Steak sauce? (shrugs shoulders and puts the sauces on his body)<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: Ok, so you are dressed as choice cuts. You go in there and yell 'Trick or Treat!'. The worm will realize he | |
| + | forgot to stock up on Halloween candy, he'll leave to buy some then we take the mattress.<br> | ||
| − | + | Patrick: Give me that cologne.<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: Now get in there!<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Happy Halloween, Squidward!<br> | |
| − | ' | + | Squidward: I am not going to get hurt this time. (hears some rattling in the distance. Its Mr. Krabs on his hospital bed rolling down the street into the dump) What the-? Isn't that Mr. Krabs? (screams as Mr. Krabs runs over Squidward, crashes through the gate, runs into a rock causing the bed to flip him over in front of his mattress. Guard worm growls)<br> |
| + | Patrick: That guard worm doesn't look very happy.<br> | ||
| + | SpongeBob: Run, Mr. Krabs! Run like you're not in a coma!<br> | ||
| − | + | Mr. Krabs: (sniffs around) It's...me money! (guard worm snarls as Mr. Krabs sends the worm into the air and off the mattress) | |
| + | Oh, money. I promise I'll never leave you alone again.<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Hey, Mr. Krabs. (Mr. Krabs jumps on his mattress and barks) No, Mr. Krabs, it's us!<br> | |
| − | + | Patrick: Trick or treat.<br> | |
| − | + | Mr. Krabs: Oh, hey SpongeBob. I didn't recognize you. Say, why are you two dressed like meat?<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Not just meat, we're choice cuts. Right, Squidward?<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: Oh, I give up. (guard worm lands in Squidward’s arm snarling at him. Squidward runs off as the worm chases him)<br> | |
| − | + | ||
| − | + | ||
{{Transcripts/Season 4}} | {{Transcripts/Season 4}} | ||
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[[Category:Episode Transcripts/Season 4]] | [[Category:Episode Transcripts/Season 4]] | ||
[[Category:Transcript]] | [[Category:Transcript]] | ||
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| + | {{Slogan}} | ||
