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Episode Transcript: Whale of a Birthday
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Ghost Host | Karate Island |
Episode Article: Whale of a Birthday
Characters
Dialogue
(opens up with Pearl sleeping until the radio wakes her up)
Radio: Good morning, Bikini Bottom! It's a very special day today because we have got the new single from Boys Who Cry: 'It's All About You'.
Song: Boys Who Cry "It's all about you" It's All About You
It's all about you girl, On your sixteenth birthday! Pay attention to you girl, Everyone has to do just what you say. You get your very own spotlight tonight, Cuz it's all about you! Yeah, it's all about Pearl! You're the birthday girl!
Pearl
Yeah! It's all about me On my 16th birthday I want music, clothes, and shiny things So give it up right away Everybody in the whole wide world They have to pay attention to me It's all about me, me...and guess who? Me!
Mr. Krabs: (Pearl crashes through the ceiling and into the kitchen on the ground floor) Neptune's trousers!
Pearl: Morning, daddy!
Mr. Krabs: Are you sure you wouldn't prefer a room on the ground floor?
Pearl: Oh, daddy. I'm just excited because tomorrow's a very special day.
Mr. Krabs: (gulps) It is? (Pearl stares at him) Oh, I mean it is! Very special. Very very special, indeed.
Pearl: You have no idea what day tomorrow is, do you?
Mr. Krabs: None at all.
Pearl: It's my 16th birthday!
Mr. Krabs: I knew that. How could you think I wouldn't know that? What are you gonna be, 12?
Pearl: I'm going to be 16! It's only the most important birthday in my entire life. If I don't have a completely awesome party, my whole high school reputation will collapse. I'll have to drop out, I won't go off to college, I'll never leave home. You'll have to support me for the rest of my life.
Mr. Krabs: (nervously chuckles) Well, we don't want that to happen.
Pearl: Then promise me you'll give me a real party this year. And don't be cheap! (nods)
(later at the high school)
Pearl: Hi, girls.
Friend #1: Hi, Pearl.
Pearl: Are you guys coming to my totally coral birthday party tomorrow?
Friend #1: I don't know, Pearl. Is this going to be as totally coral as last year, when your dad passed out paper clips as
party favors? (3 girls laugh)
Judy: Remember the time we all had to share one balloon? (balloon floats up) Please.
Friend #2: Remember the pony ride? (wooden horse with a paint can as a head and a broom stick as a tail)
Friend #1: I can't wait to see how he ruins this year. (3 girls laugh as Pearl runs out of school smiling. Shes heads
towards the Krusty Krab)
Pearl: Daddy!
Mr. Krabs: Everybody brace for impact!
Pearl: Tell me you've got something totally coral planned for my birthday party.
Mr. Krabs: Now, now, don't snap your mizzenmast. Everything is all set. Pearl: Why, I've already got the party favors! Mr. Krabs + Pearl: This year's gonna be a blast! (hugs)
Pearl: Daddy, you ruined all my birthday parties! But you better not ruin this one! Now promise me you won't be cheap
Mr. Krabs: I promise.
Pearl: Good, because I made a list. (list rolls out of the Krusty Krab and down the road. Mr Krabs rolls it up) Now I want everything on this list at my party. (kisses her dad) Bye. I'll be at the mall with my friends.
Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob?!
SpongeBob: Yes, Mr. Krabs?
Mr. Krabs: While I plan the party, I want you to buy Pearl's present. (takes out his credit card) Here you go, boy.
SpongeBob: What's this, Mr. Krabs?
Mr. Krabs: It's me credit card. You use it instead of money.
SpongeBob: I can buy stuff with just this piece of plastic? I don't need money?
Mr. Krabs: Exactly.
SpongeBob: Wow.
Mr. Krabs: Now remember, nothing's too good for me little Pearl. I wanted to give her nothing, but she's too good for that. Now, follow her around and see what she likes. You know, do some detective work.
SpongeBob: Detective work--I'm going undercover.
(later at the Bikini Bottom Mall)
Pearl: So, that's when Marcy told me that Julie said that Angela did like Brad.
Friend #1: Oh, I though she was mad about him.
SpongeBob: Me too.
Pearl: (holding up a purple, plastic comb) Oh my gosh, this is the greatest thing I have seen in the whole world.
SpongeBob: (runs up to the cashier) I'd like to buy that piece of plastic with this piece of plastic. (giggles)
Cashier: (looking at the credit card) Mr. Krabs, huh? Quick--how do you spell "Krabs"?
SpongeBob: Umm...I'm pretty sure it has a 'B' in it.
Cashier: Close enough. (swipes the credit card through the machine) There you go, kid.
SpongeBob: That's it? Hmmm, I'll never understand the workings of high finance.
Pearl: (holding up lip gloss) Wow, this is the greatest thing I've ever seen in the whole world. Glitter gloss!
SpongeBob: Oh, no, I bought the wrong present.
Judy: Pearl, you have got to see this.
Pearl: Coming, Judy.
Elderly Fish: Oh...hmmm... (mirror flips around revealing SpongeBob. He takes the glitter gloss away from the elderly fish
and the mirror flips back around)
SpongeBob: Now this is obviously the greatest present ever.
Pearl: (squeals) This is the greatest thing in the whole world! (SpongeBob sighs)
(back at the Krusty Krab where Squidward is nailing down a banner)
Squidward: The banner's up, Mr. Krabs.
Mr. Krabs: I've had that since the day she was born. I got it on sale.
Squidward: I'm sure she'll love it, Mr. Krabs.
(back at the mall)
Pearl: This sea pony is the cutest thing ever. Do you want to come home and be my pony? (pony imagines Pearl being on its back) Whee! (pony shakes its head)
Judy: Pearl, come here. This is so coral. (SpongeBob is disguised as a Dog Fish next to the pony)
Pearl: Oh my gosh, it's Billy Fishkin.
All: Hi, Billy!
Billy: Whoo Hoo! (all sighing. SpongeBob, dressed up as a girl, sighs after they do)
SpongeBob: (girly voice) Isn't he dreamy? (SpongeBob takes Billy and hands him to the cashier) Price check on four.
Billy: Me too.
(back at the Krusty Krab)
Squidward: I finished Pearl's portrait, Mr. Krabs. It's a true masterpiece. (reveals a meat sculpture of Pearl)
Mr. Krabs: Hey...maybe I should have hired that ice sculptor.
Squidward: Ice sculptor? Any fool can sculpt in ice. It takes true genius to transform 400 pounds of raw Krabby Patties into a work of such majesty.
Mr. Krabs: Yeah. Well, we've got the decor covered. Now how about entertainment? Pearl wants some boy band called 'Boys Who Cry'.
Squidward: Boys Who Cry? They're my favorite band. They charge a million dollars just to show up. And if you want them to lip-sync, it'll run into real money.
Mr. Krabs: You're a real fan, huh?
Squidward: Oh yeah, I know all their songs.
Mr. Krabs: All their songs?
(back at the mall where Pearl and friends are gazing at a bunch of things and SpongeBob buys them all, including: a dress, sunglasses, a pair of platform shoes, and other gifts)
Pearl: Wouldn't it be cool if my dad got me this for my birthday?
Friend #1: It sure would be. If he was cool, which he's not. (laughs)
Pearl: Yeah, he probably got me another box of staples.
(back at the Krusty Krab)
Mr. Krabs: It's almost time for the party to start!
SpongeBob: I'm back, Mr. Krabs!
Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob, what took you so long? And where's Pearl's present?
SpongeBob: The delivery truck will be here momentarily.
Squidward: Here she comes, Mr. Krabs.
Mr. Krabs: Everybody get into position. (Pearl and friends enter)
All: Happy birthday! (everyone is standing in front of the banner that reads 'IT'S A GIRL')
Judy: "It's a girl!" (Pearl and 3 friends laugh)
Pearl: Daddy! It's fun! (friends walk over to the popcorn machine and eat up the popcorn)
Friend #1: Stale popcorn. (friends walk over to the punchbowl and drink).
Squidward: It is fun. (friends drink the punch)
Pearl: (notices the sculpture) Is that supposed to be me? (head falls off) It's made out of ice! Whoo Hoo!
SpongeBob: On the sculpture, it is ice! Because who all wants some cake?
Pearl: Well, the cake does look good. (all eat the cake)
Mr. Krabs: And frosting.
Friend #1: Well, Pearl, 15 lame parties in a row. But this one is great.
SpongeBob: No root beer, but...
Pearl: Wait, don't leave. My dad got Boys Who Cry to play. You did get Boys Who Cry, right?
Mr. Krabs: Oh, even better sweetie. Hit it. (Music plays)
Boys Who Cry: Hello, ladies. It's all about you girl, On your sixteenth birthday! Pay attention to you girl, Everyone has to do just what you say. You get your very own spotlight tonight, Cuz it's all about you! Yeah, it's all about Pearl! You're the birthday girl Huh!
Friend #2: Hey, that is Boys Who Cry.
Judy: Yeah!
Friend #2: Yea!
Friend #1: What a do not rip-off.
Judy: This is great!
Pearl: Daddy, how could you make it cool? I gave you a list and you made it better. (dances smiling)
Mr. Krabs: Pearl, come back. (crowd dances at Boys Who Cry)
Pearl: You did everything! You stopped being cheap. (laughs)
Mr. Krabs: I'll make it even cooler, Pearl.
SpongeBob: That's it. Back it up. Right there. Let 'er go! (dump truck full of presents unloads them all)
Pearl: You bought me a Boys Who Cry CD?
Mr. Krabs: I did? I mean...I did?
Friends: Wow.
Pearl: Oh, daddy, I don't know how it could get better than this.
SpongeBob + Pearl: Hit it boys!
Endsong: Boys Who Cry "It's All About You"
It's all about you girl,
On your sixteenth birthday!
Pay attention to you girl,
Everyone has to do just what you say.
You get your very own spotlight tonight,
Cuz it's all about you!
Yeah, it's all about Pearl!
You're the birthday girl!
Mr. Krabs: Boy, how much is all this 500 dollars costing me?
SpongeBob: Here's the receipt.
Mr. Krabs: (freaks out) Billy...
Spongebob: Oh, you got me everything Pearl wanted. (kisses Pearl)
Pearl: Ah, nothing's too good for my daddy.(Spongebob and her dances & laughs so hard)
SpongeBob: You're a good whale, Pearl.
Pearl: Get your luck, boy.