Episode Transcript: Pineapple Fever

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;Squidward: Curse you Preflemuster.
 
;Squidward: Curse you Preflemuster.
  
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[[Category:Transcript]]
 
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Revision as of 00:48, 7 April 2010

(One morning at SpongeBob's pineapple, SpongeBob looks out the window, then goes out in the hallway. He yawns and sticks his tongue out. Then he comes out wearing a pair of goggles over his eyes rather than his usual pair of glasses to go jellyfishing. He clears his throat.)

SpongeBob
Hey, Patrick.
Patrick
Hey, SpongeBob.
SpongeBob
All ready to go jellyfishing today?
Patrick
No. Just kidding!

(SpongeBob Laughs. Patrick shows a net with two scoops)

SpongeBob
I see you even brought your double net.
Patrick
Yep. It's three times as fun.
SpongeBob
Um, Patrick? Don't you mean twice as fun?
Patrick
Whst is?
SpongeBob
Your -- never mind.
Patrick
Oh, SpongeBob, That reminds me. We should probably check the weather report before we go.
SpongeBob
Good idea.

(Cut back to the pineapple where Patrick and SpongeBob are watching the weather report on TV.)

TV Reporter
And now the weather.
SpongeBob
Here we go.
Weatherman
Thank you, Phil. Today's weather forecast calls for -- (a piece of paper is given) A horrible storm will ravage the Bikini Bottom area.
Patrick And SpongeBob
A horrible storm?
Weatherman
You heard me. Panic is not advised although it is recommended. Also, an advisory has been issued to avoid any and all jellyfishing if possible.

(TV turns off, SpongeBob now stands in front of his living room window with some boards in his hands.)

SpongeBob
Patrick, help me get these boards nailed on.
Patrick
SpongeBob, this seems like a strange time to start decorating.
SpongeBob
Start dec -- you sir, do not recognize fine decorating when you see it.

(He goes up to his big bass on the wall to show an example.)

Patrick
Hmm.
SpongeBob
Admire it later, Patrick. Right now, we got to convert my house into a shelter capable to withstand extreme weather.
Patrick
You can say that again.
SpongeBob
Actually, I can't.
Patrick
Why?
SpongeBob
Because I just stepped on one of these nails.

(shows a picture of SpongeBob's shoe with a nail sticking out. Cut to Squidward's house humming and tweezing his eyebrows)

Squidward: Got ya. Now just one quick flick of the wrist, and --

(cut back to SpongeBob's where Patrick angrily nails a hammer causing a racket at Squidward's. He falls and bumps his head on his toilet, and it looks like his eyebrows are bleeding, but it's not he tweezed his skin off his eyebrow. He looks and gets angry. Then we are back to SpongeBob's pineapple where SpongeBob and Patrick are hammering his door.)

Patrick
Violin.
SpongeBob
Whoo! Nice work buddy. Now my house can withstand anything nature has to throw at us.

(Squidward angrily knocks down SpongeBob's door)

Patrick
I guess Squidward's not part of nature.
SpongeBob
Squidward! Did you come to weather out the storm with us?
Squidward
No! I-- what storm?
SpongeBob
The one Phil Preflemuster told us about.
Swquidward
Who's that?
Patrick
He's the weatherman on the news channel. He said --
Squidward
I can't understand a word you're saying.
SpongeBob
C'mon Squidward, it'll be fun! While the elements rage outside, we'll snuggle in here and pass the time by playing board games, and playing tic-tac-toe, and drinkin' hot cocoa, and playing tic-tac-toe, and doing jigsaw puzzles, and watchin' TV, and playin' board games, and drinkin' hot cocoa, and doing jigsaw puzzles, and playin' board games, and drinkin' hot teeeeea-
Patrick
I THOUGHT IT WAS COCOA!!!!
SpongeBob
Oh, yeah. Hot cocoooooooa, we'll be drinking.
Patrick
That's better.
Squidward
Well, I think I'll pass.
SpongeBob
Even if I let you borrow my huggly snuggly bunny slippers?
Squidward
Hmm, I'll have to think about that.
SpongeBob
OK, but you better think fast. Because Partick really likes --

(Squidward starts to leave when a bolt of lightning strikes. Squidward comes back burnt from the lightning strike.)

SpongeBob
Squidward, welcome back! Here's your slippers.

(another bolt of lightning strikes, and now we see Candles lit)

SpongeBob
That's better.
Squdward
What's better about it? I liked it better before, when I could see.
SpongeBob
Squidward, the lights went out
Squidward
Yes, they did, when you turned them off.

(Patrick Spits out his cocoa)

Patrick
SpongeBob!
SpongeBob
Patrick! What is it?
Patrick
I never realized how delicious your hot cocoa is.
SpongeBob
Thank you, Patrick.
Squidward
Oh, boy. How about some of those games you promised?

(yet another bolt of lightning strikes. The lightning causes impact on SpongeBob's pineapple leaves. SpongeBob, Patrick, and Squidward get ready to play tic-tac-toe)

SpongeBob
Okay, boys let's roll to see who goes first.
Squidward
This is tic-tac-toe. You don't roll to see who goes first.
Patrick
He's right. You play rock, paper, scissors for it.
SpongeBob
Oh yeah.

(shot of the exterior of the pineapple again. Then Patrick holds up a "paper" hand, Squidward also holds up a "paper" hand, and SpongeBob holds up a "paper" hand)

Patrick
One.
Squidward
Two.
SpongeBob
Oh, it's a tie.
Patrick
Darn it!
Patrick, SpongeBob, Squidward
One, two, three.
Patrick
Darn it! I'll get you next time.
Squidward
One, two, three.
SpongeBob
Tie.
Patrick
Darn it!
Squidward
One, two --
SpongeBob
Tie.
Patrick
Darn it!

(another shot of the pineapple then cut to Squidward with a tic-tac-toe board already made crossed off the X's.)

Squidward
There, I win. See?

(then we see SpongeBob and Patrick thinking. the clothes that Patrick is wearing is a bow, and SpongeBob is wearing a visor with reading glasses.)

Patrick
I'm not seeing anything here.


SpongeBob
Yeah it looks like a lot of junk.
Squidward
What do you mean, you're not seeing anything? That's three in a row. Tic-tac-toe!
Patrick
Easy, friend.
SpongeBob
Yeah, relax, Squidward. We're just having fun.

(he takes out a rulebook for tic-tac-toe.and flips through pages.)

SpongeBob
Oh, okay, yeah, okay. Here we go. Congratulations, Squidward.
Patrick
Well played.

(they clap; Squidward looks as if he's about to cry. Yet another shot of the pineapple)

SpongeBob
Come on, Patrick. You can do it.

(Patrick groans)

SpongeBob
Be the puzzle piece.
Patrick
Cannot complete jigsaw puzzle! Difficulty level too advanced. Rate of brain activity increasing decreased by 30 years per second.
SpongeBob
Come on, Grandpa, you can do it. You got a few years left in you.
Patrick
Eh?
SpongeBob
Go, Patrick, go! Go, Patrick, Go! Go, Patrick, go!

(Squidqward wakes up from a nap)

SpongeBob
Go, Patrick!
Squidward
I told you creatures I was trying to take a nap over here. Now for the last time can't you just--
SpongeBob
Hang on, Squidward. Patrick was just about to figure out where this last piece of the puzzle goes. WEREN'T YOU PATRICK?!
Patrick
Who's The green guy?
Squidward
It's the last piece of the puzzle! There's only one place it can go. Right here!
SpongeBob
Squidward. That wasn't your turn. That's cheating.
Squidward
Cheating? It's a jigsaw puzzle. You can't cheat.
SpongeBob
Oh, it's ok, Squidward. We'll just start over.

(SpongeBob jumbles the pieces, Squidward mumbles)

Squidward
I've got to get out of here!

(yet another lightning bolt strikes Squidward he comes back burnt again.)

SpongeBob
oh, welcome back, Squidward. We Were about to figure out where the first piece of the puzzle goes. Oh, maybe Squidward can help us.
Squidward
No he can't.
SpongeBob
Please, Squidward?
Squidward
No way.
SpongeBob
Please.
Squidward
I have an even better idea.
SpongeBob
What is it?
Patrick
Tell us.
Both
Tell us! Tell us! Tell us! Tell us!
Squuidward
Shh. Quiet time. It's a game called "boundaries".
Patrick
Ooh-ooh!
Squidward
Yes, Patrick?
Patrick
Will there be any spelling in that game?
Squdward
Oh no, No spelling.
Patrick
Yes!
Squidward
It's very simple. The object of the game is to see how long everyone leaves Squidward alone until the storm passes. He will stay inside boundaries, he will define by chalk lines on the floor.
SpongeBob
I have a question.
Squidward
What?
SpongeBob
Where are we going to get the chalk?
Squidward
The chalk? I brought some!

(yet another flash of lightninng. An organ plays an ominous tune as Squidward goes up to SpongeBob's room. He draws the chalk line at the top of the stairs then tosses the chalk to SpongeBob and Patrick. Then. Squidward slams SpongeBob's bedroom door.)

Squidward
Brilliant work, as usual, Squidward. Now all I have to do is sit here until this storm passes over. (his stomach starts growling.) Wait a minute. I'm starving. SpongeBob's got to have some snacks around here. Ah, Jackpot.

(he starts eating snail food. Gary meows) I bet you wish I had some of this -- Snail food? (he spits the food out.) I've got to get some real food.

(SpongeBob is now dressed as a security guard)

SpongeBob
HALT! Nobody's to cross this boundary.
Squidward
I'm the one who drew the line. You're not supposed to cross.
SpongeBob
If you're the one who drew it, let me see some identification papers.
Squidward
Fine. But when this storm blows over, you'll regret this, mister. What the-- what? I don't have them. they must be in my other pants. Look, if you just let me cross, I can go get them.
SpongeBob
You may be telling the truth.
Squidward
Oh, thank you. I'm just so hungry.
SpongeBob
But then again, you may not. Come with me. We shall find out the truth.
Squidward
That'll be the day.

(Squidward runs downstairs, SpongeBob blows his whistle. Squidward makes it towards the kitchen, and near Spongebob's refrigerator.)

SpongeBob
Stop that cephalod!

(he jumps out of his security guard costume leaving on his underwear, and jumps on Squidward's back)

Squidward
Please. I just want to get onto the other side of my boundary.
Spongebob
This, I cannot allow. It's against the rules.
Squidward
But all I wanted was something to eat
Patrick
Did somebody say somethng to eat?

(SpongeBob and Squidward run into Patrick leaving food everywhere.)

Squidward
My food!
SpongeBob
Your food?
Patrick
Hey, I want some too.

(they run around in circles screaming.)

Squidward
Is this what we've really come to? is one little storm all it takes to turn us all into complete animals?
SpongeBob
Apparently so. Well, that and a refrigerator full of food anyways.
Squidward
Did you guys hear that?
Spongebob
It's just Patrick gnawing on his can.
Squidward
No, not that. I mean from outside.
SpongeBob
I don't hear anything.
Squidward
The storm must've Stopped.
SpongeBob
Squidward, wait!
Squidward
So long, suckers!

(the last shot of the episode shows Squidward falling from something. SpongeBob's Pineapple is now at the top of a tornado.)

Squidward
Curse you Preflemuster.

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