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Editing Episode Transcript: Money Talks
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| − | !Back Episode | + | !Back Episode Transscript |
| − | !Next Episode | + | !Next Episode Transscript |
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| − | |align="center" rowspan="3"|[[Episode | + | |align="center" rowspan="3"|[[Episode Transscript: Breath Of Fresh Squidward|Breath Of Fresh Squidward]] |
| − | |[[Episode | + | |[[Episode Transscript: SpongeBob Vs. Krabby Gadget|SpngeBob vs. Krabby Gadget]] |
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| − | Episode Article: [[ | + | Episode Article: [[Money Talks]] |
==Characters== | ==Characters== | ||
| − | *[[ | + | *[[SpongeBob]] |
| − | *[[ | + | *[[Patrick]] |
| − | *[[ | + | *[[Squidward]] |
| − | *[[ | + | *[[Mr. Krabs]] |
*[[Flying Dutchman]] | *[[Flying Dutchman]] | ||
| − | + | (at the Krusty Krab)<br> | |
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| − | + | Spongebob: May I help you, sir?<br> | |
| − | ' | + | Customer: I'd like that table over by the window. (points to the table behind him where an elderly couple is sitting)<br> |
| − | + | Spongebob: As soon as the present customers are done with it. They like to chew their food thouroughly.<br> | |
| − | + | Lady: 97... 98... 99...<br> | |
| − | ' | + | Man: Don't rush me, woman!<br> |
| − | + | Customer: Perhaps this will speed up the process. (shows him some money)<br> | |
| − | + | Spongebob: How will that help them chew faster?<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: Spongebob, what's the problem?<br> | |
| − | + | Spongebob: No problem, I was just telling this customer he needed to wait for his favorite table.<br> | |
| − | + | Customer: Five bucks if I get the table now. (Mr Krabs kicks out the elderly couple)<br> | |
| − | + | Lady: Ow, my hip.<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: (ties a bib around the customer's neck) Enjoy your meal. Let me know if you need anything else.<br> | |
| − | + | Spongebob: Why did you give him the table?<br> | |
| − | + | ||
| − | + | Mr Krabs: You know what they say: "money talks". (kisses the oney)<br> | |
| − | + | Spongebob: I didn't know money could talk. Did it tell you to kick those old people out? (talking to money) What do you | |
| + | have againt old people?<br> | ||
| − | + | Mr Krabs: Don't go goofy on me, boy. Money can't really talk. Only fish can talk.<br> | |
| − | + | Spongebob: Wouldn't it be neat if money could talk?<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: (chuckles) Yeah. Wait a minute...<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: What's that music?<br> | |
| − | + | Spongebob: I think Mr Krabs is gonna sing.<br> | |
| − | + | Squidward: Oh, great. | |
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| − | + | '''Music:''' "[[If I Could Talk To Money]]" | |
| − | + | ||
| − | + | If I could talk to money | |
| + | How great my life would be | ||
| + | We'd tell each other secrets | ||
| + | All their friends would visit me | ||
| − | ' | + | I'd bathe in filthy riches |
| + | Which is clean enough for me | ||
| + | Oh, if you could tell me what you want | ||
| + | How happy we would be | ||
| − | + | We'd surely be the best of friends | |
| − | + | We'd never disagree | |
| − | We'd | + | There wouldn't be a downside |
| − | + | Not one that I could see | |
| − | + | If I could talk to money | |
| + | Come along, sing with me | ||
| − | ' | + | If I could talk to money |
| + | And it could talk to me | ||
| + | We'd always be the best of friends | ||
| + | For all eternity | ||
| − | + | Patrick: (comes out of the bathroom) What did I miss?<br> | |
| − | '''Flying Dutchman | + | Mr Krabs: Oh... (starts to sing but customers walk away. Cut to later that night at Mr Krabs' house) Parlez vous francais? |
| + | Hable espanol? Oo-yay eak-spay ig-pay atin-lay? (uses stethoscope on money) Mm-hmm. (turns on a light over the money) Maybe | ||
| + | this will make you talk. Talk! You're being too hard on the little guy. You can talk to me. I'm your friend. (cries) I | ||
| + | would give anything to talk to money. Anything! (Flying Dutchman appears)<br> | ||
| − | + | Flying Dutchman: Anything?<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: You?<br> | |
| − | + | ||
| − | ' | + | Flying Dutchman: That's right. 'Tis I, the ominous Flying Dutchman. I'll grant your wish but it'll cost you. (contract |
| + | appears in front of Mr Krabs)<br> | ||
| − | + | Mr Krabs: Yeah, yeah, my immortal soul. I've heard that speech before. (signs contract)<br> | |
| − | + | Flying Dutchman: Wha...? Well, uh, great. But be warned!<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: Yeah, yeah, skip the lecture. I want what's coming to me. | |
| − | + | Flying Dutchman: Humph, you're no fun at al, you know that? (gets out some magic dust from his pouch)<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: Hey, is that pixie dust? (Flying Dutchman throws the dust in his eyes, causing him to scream. Mr Krabs wakes up) | |
| + | Whew, that was a strange dream.<br> | ||
| − | + | Money: You think that was a strange dream? I dreamt I was trapped in a prison made of peanut butter.<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: Who said that?<br> | |
| − | + | Money: Down here.<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: Hey, it's a nickel. What were you doing in my belly button, little fella?<br> | |
| − | + | Nickel: I got stuck in there during your last coin shower. (shudders) I don't want to talk about it.<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: (takes his wallet and takes out a five-dollar bill) Do you have anything to say to me?<br> | |
| − | + | Dollar Bill: Yeah, when was the last time you brushed your teeth?<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: It worked! I can talk to money. Oh...<br> | |
| − | + | Nickel: Please, don't start singing again. (cut to Krusty Krab, the next day)<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: Don't worry, darlings. Soon you'll be rejoined with all your friends. (kisses his money)<br> | |
| − | + | Lady: Oh, my, why don't you kiss me like that?<br> | |
| − | + | Man: Don't start.<br> | |
| − | ' | + | Squidward: That'll be five dollars. (puts money in register) |
| − | + | Five-Dollar Bill: Hey, dudes.<br> | |
| − | + | Money: Run, jump! Jump out! Jump out! (Mr Krabs closes the register and chuckles)<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: (opens up his safe) Good morning, my darlings.<br> | |
| − | + | Money: Good morning, Mr Krabs.<br> | |
| − | ' | + | Mr Krabs: You're coming home with me.<br> |
| − | + | Money: Yay!<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: Spongebob, I did it. I can talk to money. (shows him a bag of money) Go ahead, say hello.<br> | |
| − | + | Spongebob: Hello... money.<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: (laughs) Oh, aren't they a riot? (walks out the Krusty Krab)<br> | |
| − | + | Spongebob: I'm starting to worry about Mr Krabs.<br> | |
| − | ' | + | Squidward: I'm worried he just left with my paycheck. (cut to Mr Krabs' house where he's on the floor with his money)<br> |
| − | '' | + | Mr Krabs: Now that we're alone, let's tell each other secrets.<br> |
| − | + | One-Dollar: What kind of secrets are you talking about?<br> | |
| − | + | Dime: Yeah, we live in a safe.<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: You have any friends you can invite over? | |
| − | + | One-Dollar: Aren't we enough for you?<br> | |
| − | + | Dime: Yeah, what's wrong with us?<br> | |
| − | + | Money: Yeah!<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: Nothing, nothing. You guys are great. I thought you guy might want some company, you know, to make you happy.<br> | |
| − | + | Money: Why don't you ask what would make us happy.<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: Ok, so how can I make you happy?<br> | |
| − | + | Money: Spend ua!<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: What?<br> | |
| − | + | Dime: We're money. It's in our nature.<br> | |
| − | + | One-Dollar: I've been trapped in that safe for eight years. I always wanted to be spent on a fairy princess outfit.<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: What? No way.<br> | |
| − | + | Ten-Dollar: I want to be spent on corn dogs.<br> | |
| − | + | Five-Dollar: I want to be spent on diapers.<br> | |
| − | + | Money: Yeah, yeah, me too.<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: Oh, wait a minute. I am not spending you on corn dogs, diapers, or fairy princess outfits. (cut to the mall)<br> | |
| − | + | Clerk: Did you find everything ok?<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: (dressed up in the outfits that the money were talking about) Unfortunately.<br> | |
| − | + | Money: All right! (Mr Krabs cries)<br> | |
| − | + | Spongebob: (dressed in same outfit as Mr Krabs but it's blue) Mr Krabs, lookin' good. (Mr Krabs gasps and runs away)<br> | |
| − | + | Patrick: (dressed in same outfit but it's green) What's wrong with Mr Krabs?<br> | |
| − | + | Spongebob: I don't know. He's acting kind of weird. (cut back to Mr Krabs' house)<br> | |
| − | + | Money: (moaning) Spend us. Spend us.<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: I can't spend all of you. And none of you want to be spent on stuff I want.<br> | |
| − | + | Money: Spend us.<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: Ah, you're all shallow and self-absorbed. What did I ever see in you?<br> | |
| − | + | Money: Spend us.<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: I'm not listening...<br> | |
| + | Money: Spend us.<br> | ||
| − | ' | + | Mr Krabs: I'm not... (knock on door) Spongebob?<br> |
| − | + | Spongebob: Hi, Mr Krabs. I just came by to make sure you weren't, you know, totally insane.<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: (chuckles) Take this bag as far away as possible and bury it. (closes door then nervously chuckles) What have I done? (opens door) Give me that back. (takes the bag of money and closes door again)<br> | |
| − | ' | + | Spongebob: Ok, glad you're not insane. (cut to later)<br> |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: Dutchman, you cheated me. Take this horrible curse away! I want a refund.<br> | |
| − | + | Flying Dutchman: All sales are final from the Flying Dutchman, especially for a selfish shellfish like yourself. Try saying that three times fast. Your soul's going into me fanny pack of despair. (squeals) Now pay up. Huh? An I.O.U.?<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: Hehe, yeah, well, I sort of sold my soul already. | |
| − | + | Flying Dutchman: What? To who?<br> | |
| − | + | Mr Krabs: To these guys. (points to some monsters beside him)<br> | |
| − | + | Monster: We were here first, pops.<br> | |
| − | + | Monster #2: We've all god a claim on Krabs's soul.<br> | |
| − | + | Monster: Get to the back of the line.<br> | |
| − | ' | + | Mr Krabs: Now, now, I'm sure we can sort this out. (Flying Dutcman moves to the back of the line behind Spongebob)<br> |
| − | + | Flying Dutchman: You, too, Spongebob?<br> | |
| − | + | Spongebob: He was short five dollars on payday. (Flying Dutchman sighs) | |
| − | + | [[Category:Transscript]] | |
| + | [[Category:Episode Transscripts/Season 5]] | ||
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