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Transcript: The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie/Part 3
Dialogue
Top of Trench
(The Group happily reachs the top as SpongeBob notes a sign)
SpongeBob: "Shell City, dead ahead." We did it, Pat! We made it past everything! Even the hideous, disgusting monsters. (Monsters begin to walk away) Not you guys. You guys are awesome! (Monsters just keep walking) Well, Patrick, we should be there in one more verse.
SpongeBob and Patrick: Now that we're men...(They are interrupted by Dennis the exterminator)
Dennis: Finally. I got you right where I want you.
SpongeBob: Can I help you with something, sir?
Dennis: Name's Dennis. I've been hired to exterminate you.
SpongeBob: You're gonna exterminate us? Listen, junior, you caught me and my friend here in a good mood today, so I'm gonna let you off with a warning. Step aside, and you won't have to feel the awesome wrath of our mustaches.
Dennis: You mean these? (Took SpongeBob and Patrick's fake mustache from their faces) I thought you still had a piece of salad stuck to your lip from lunchtime.
SpongeBob: They were fake?
Dennis: Of course they were fake! This is what a real mustache looks like. (Dennis grew a mustache)
Patrick: Is he a mermaid?
Dennis:All right. Enough gab.
SpongeBob: What are you gonna do to us?
Dennis: Plankton was very specific.
SpongeBob and Patrick: Plankton?
Dennis: For some reason, he wanted me to step on you.
SpongeBob and Patrick: Step on us?
Dennis: Yeah! That way you'll never find out that he stole the crown! Perhaps I've said too much.
SpongeBob: That's a big boot.
Dennis: Don't worry. This will only hurt a lot. I love this job! (large boot stomps on Dennis)
Patrick: Bigger boot!
SpongeBob: Wait, Pat. This bigger boot saved our lives. Thank you, stranger. Stranger?
Patrick: It's the Cyclops!
SpongeBob and Patrick: Help us! Help us! Save us, someone!
(SpongeBob and Patrick have recovered)
Patrick: Are we dead?
SpongeBob: I don't think so. Artificially colored rocks? I don't know where we are. What is this?
Patrick: It's some kind of wall of psychic energy.
SpongeBob: No, Pat, it's a giant glass bowl. Hey, there's some fish folk.
SpongeBob and Patrick: Hey, over here! Hey! Hey! Hey, you guys! You guys, hey! Help! Hey! Help! A little help here! We're stuck in this...Help us out of the tank!
SpongeBob: Wait a second. Those fish are dead.
Patrick: What's he gonna do with us? Oh, no, he's going for his evil instruments of torture.
SpongeBob: Glue? Google eyes? He's making a humorous diorama of...Alexander Clam Bell? Patrick, he's killing sea animals and making them into smelly knickknacks. And I think we're next.
Patrick: You think so? (Cyclops takes Patrick out of bowl)
SpongeBob: Patrick! No! (Cyclops takes SpongeBob out of bowl and puts both on a table) The heat is so intense from this lamp that I can't move.
Patrick: Tell me about it.
SpongeBob: This doesn't look too good, Patrick.
Patrick: (In a old man voice) You mean we're not gonna get the crown, save the town and Mr. Krabs? I don't even think we're gonna be able to save ourselves, buddy. (SpongeBob's arm fell off then Patrick tried to put it back)
SpongeBob: (Old man voice) Thanks.
Patrick: Don't mention it.
SpongeBob: Well, it looks like what everybody said about us is true, Patrick.
Patrick: You mean that we're attractive?
SpongeBob: No, that we're just kids. A couple of kids in way over their heads. We were doomed from the start. I mean, look at us. We didn't even come close to the crown. We let everybody down. We failed.
Patrick: Shell City.
SpongeBob: Yeah, we never made it to Shell City.
Patrick: Shell City.
SpongeBob: Exactly, buddy. Yeah, the place we never got to.
Patrick: Shell City.
SpongeBob: Okay, now you're starting to bum me out, Patrick.
Patrick: No, look at the sign. (SpongeBob sees what he was talking about. A sign by the door) "Shell City. Marine gifts and sundries."
SpongeBob: Shell City is a gift shop? But if this is Shell City, then where's the...? (He and Patrick notice Neptune's crown sitting on a cushion)
Patrick and SpongeBob: Crown!
SpongeBob: Neptune's crown. This is Shell City. Pat, we did make it. Yeah, I guess we did. We did all right for a couple of goofballs. (both shed one tear of joy)
SpongeBob: (In a weakly voice) I'm a Goofy Goober, yeah...
Patrick: (Also in a weakly voice) You're a Goofy Goober, yeah...
SpongeBob and Patrick: We're all Goofy Goobers, yeah Goofy, goofy, goober, goober, yeah (the two dehydrate)
The Theater
(All of the pirates are crying)
Captain: That's the end of SpongeBob. (To a pirate) Come here, you.
Captain's Parrot: Shut up and look at the screen.
Captain: The bird's right. Look. It be the tear of the Goofy Goobers.
Shell City
(We see SpongeBob and Patrick's tears short circiut the lamp, and the smoke turns on the sprinklers. They come back to life from the water and suffocate for one second)
SpongeBob: Hey, we're alive. Let's get that crown.
Patrick: Right.
SpongeBob: On three, Patrick. Ready? One, two, three. (They pick it up) Hey, it's lighter than I thought. (The camera pulls up to reveal that the Cyclops is the one that picked it up. Suddenly, all of the sea creatures in the room begin to shake and come back to life)
Patrick: What's happening?
SpongeBob: I don't know. Look! (All of the sea creatures are now alive. They attack the Cyclops and Sponge and Pat escape) Come on, Patrick. Let's get this crown back to Bikini Bottom. (The two carry the crown outside to the beach)
The Beach
SpongeBob: Do you still have that bag of winds?
Patrick: I sure do. (Patrick shows a lump on his butt) Here you go(pulls out bag).(the lump is really excretment) What?
SpongeBob: Nothing, nothing...Okay, let's go over the instructions. Let's see, it says here, "Step one: Point bag away from home. "
Patrick: Okay (points bag at Shell City).
SpongeBob: "Step two: Plant feet firmly on ground. "
Patrick: Right! (Plants his feet in the sand)
SpongeBob: "Step three: Remove string from bag, releasing the winds. "
Patrick: Check. (pulls string and the bag flies out of his arm)
SpongeBob: Well, that seems simple enough. Point bag away from home,feet firmly on ground, pull string, releasing the winds. All right, let's do it for real.
Patrick: Uh, SpongeBob?
SpongeBob: No, no, stop! (chase after bag)
Patrick: I was bad, I'm sorry! Please, bag. I'm sorry, I just thought...It was a mistake!
SpongeBob: Oh, no. How will we ever get back to Bikini Bottom now?
David Hasselhoff: I can take you there.
SpongeBob: Who are you?
David HasselhoffI'm David Hasselhoff.
SpongeBob and Patrick: Hooray!
SpongeBob: So where's your boat?
David Hasselhoff: Boat? (he laughs hearty)
SpongeBob and Patrick:(Hasselhoff swims toward Bikini Bottom) Go, Hasselhoff.
SpongeBob: Next stop, Bikini Bottom.
Bikini Bottom
Slaves: All hail Plankton. All hail Plankton.
Inside the Krusty Krab 2
Plankton: Well, Krabs, you know what today is? (Looks at calendar. The date is wrong) Sorry about this, calendar. (Changes it) March 14 ?. Wait, that's not right. It should say "The day that Krabs fries!" (Looks out the window and sees Neptune and Mindy arrive) Guess who's here.
Above the Pacific Ocean
SpongeBob:(Hasselhoff is now gliding like a motor boat) Hooray for Hasselhoff! Nothing can stop us now.
David Hasselhoff: Hmm! Unidentified object off the hindquarters.
SpongeBob: It looks like...
SpongeBob: Bigger boot. But how? Dennis! (the boot slips onto Hasselhoff’s foot, then lifts, and Dennis reforms, his glasses were broken. SpongeBob and Patrick scream) Huh! Dennis!
Dennis: Did you miss me?
Inside the Krusty Krab 2
Plankton: (He has popcorn and a drink with him. He is sitting on a small chair) This is the best seat in the house. All right, Neptune, let's get it on!
Neptune: Eugene Krabs, your six-day reprieve is up, and it is time for you to die!
Mr. Krabs: (Krabs is rapidly sweating mounds of ice cubes) Please, I didn't do it.
Neptune: There is nothing else I can do.
Mindy: You can give SpongeBob and Patrick a little more time.
Neptune: Except give SpongeBob and Patrick a little more time...What? (Realizes what he just said, then turns to Mindy) Mindy, will you butt out? I won't have you stalling this execution.
Mindy: Stalling? I'm not stalling anything.
Neptune: Yes, you are.
Mindy: No, I'm not.
Neptune: Yes, you are. You're doing it right now.
Mindy: I'm stalling.
Neptune: Yes.
Mindy: Stalling?
Neptune: Stalling!
Mindy: Stalling.
Neptune: Stalling!
Plankton: Oh, boy.
Dennis: Now, where were we?
SpongeBob: Patrick, run. No, I'm tired of running. If we run now, we'll never stop...
Patrick:(Dennis throws Patrick towards Hasselhoff's feet) Run, SpongeBob!
David HasselhoffTake it easy back there, fellas.
Patrick: SpongeBob, be careful.
Dennis: Come on, kid, give it up. Dennis always gets his man.
SpongeBob: Never!... (Jumps to Hasselhoff's other foot) Yeah! I did it!
Dennis: You got guts, kid. Too bad I gotta rip them out of you.
SpongeBob: I don't know what Plankton's paying you, but if you let us go, I can make it worth your while. (gives Dennis 5 Gobber Dollers)
Dennis: It's gonna take a lot more than five...What is this?
SpongeBob: That, sir, is five Goober Dollars. Legal tender at any participating Goofy Goober (Grabs SpongeBob)... I got bubbles. Fun at parties. (Wind blows bubbles into Dennis' eyes)
Dennis: My eyes! (Throws SpongeBob)
Patrick: I got you, SpongeBob. (Catches him)
SpongeBob: Thanks, buddy. (Sees Dennis about to step on them) Thanks a lot.
Dennis: (Last lines) That's it. I'm through messing around. See you later, fools! (Is hit by an oncoming bridge, Dennis screams)
Patrick: See you.
Inside the Krusty Krab 2
Mindy: So you think....I'm....stalling.
Neptune: Where am I, in Crazytown? I have had enough of this nonsense! You are to wait in the carriage until the execution is done!
Mindy: But, Daddy...
Neptune: Now! (She goes outside. Neptune put locks on the door)
Mindy: No, no, no! Oh, SpongeBob, wherever you are, you better hurry.
Hasselhoff: (Stands up) Okay, fellas, this is where you get off. Bikini Bottom's directly below.
SpongeBob: But we'll never be able to float down in time.
Hasselhoff: Who said anything about floating? (Pecs turn into launchers)
Announcer:Initiating launch sequence.
SpongeBob: Did you see that?
Patrick: The control.
Announcer: All hands on deck. Ten seconds to liftoff. Nine, eight...
Inside the Krusty Krab 2
Neptune: (Lights his triton) Eugene Krabs, the time has come...
Mindy: (Outside) No!
Plankton: Yes!
Above Bikini Bottom
Announcer: ...six, five...
Inside the Krusty Krab 2
Neptune: ....for you....
Mindy: (Outside) No!
Plankton: Yes!
Above Bikini Bottom
Announcer: ...three, two...
Inside the Krusty Krab 2
Neptune: ....to fry!
Mindy: (Outside) No!
Plankton: Yes!
Above Bikini Bottom
Announcer: ... one. (SpongeBob, Patrick, and the crown are launched back down to Bikini Bottom)
Inside the Krusty Krab 2
Mr. Krabs: NO! (Just then, Sponge and Pat fall through the roof. Krabs is about to be fried, but the crown blocks the ray, and it is blasted up to land, where Hasselhoff is lying down)
Above Bikini Bottom
Hasselhoff: (Last lines) You done good, Hasselhoff. You done... (He is blasted with Neptune's ray and survives) ow.
Inside the Krusty Krab 2
SpongeBob: Hooray! We made it!
Patrick: We made it!
Neptune:My crown! My beautiful crown!
Mindy: (Comes inside) SpongeBob? Patrick? I knew you could do it! (Hugs them. Plankton then starts clapping slowly)
Plankton: (Sarcastically) Oh, yes. Well done, SpongeBoob.
SpongeBob: (Sarcastically) Sorry to rain on your parade, Plankton.
Plankton: Oh, don't worry about me. My parade shall be quite dry under my umbrella! (Pulls a cord that is hanging above him)
SpongeBob, Mindy, and Patrick: Umbrella? (Turn to Neptune, who is kissing his crown. The ceiling opens up and a helmet falls out. It lands on Neptune's head. He struggles to get it off)
Mindy: Daddy, no!
Plankton: Daddy, yes! (Pulls out a remote control with only a big, red button on it. He presses the button)
Neptune: (We see Neptune still struggling. A few seconds later, he stops and says only 3 words) All hail Plankton. (Mindy, SpongeBob, and Patrick scream. Plankton's slaves burst in through the windows)
Slaves: All hail Plankton. All hail Plankton. All hail Plankton. All hail Plankton. (Patrick, Mindy, and SpongeBob back up against the wall. Neptune lights his triton)
Patrick: SpongeBob, what happened?
SpongeBob: Plankton cheated.
Plankton: Cheated? (Now to Neptune) Hold on there, baldy. (Now to SpongeBob) Oh, grow up. What, you think this is a game of kickball on the playground? You never had a chance to defeat me, fool! And you know why?
SpongeBob: Because you cheated?
Plankton: No, not because I cheated! Because I'm an evil genius. And you're just a kid. A stupid kid!
SpongeBob: I guess you're right, Plankton. I am just a kid.
Plankton: Of course I'm right. Okay, Neptune, time to kill.
SpongeBob: And you know, I've been through a lot in the past six days, five minutes, and seven-and-a-half seconds. And if I've learned anything during that time, It's that you are who you are.
Plankton: That's right. Okay, Neptune...
SpongeBob: And no amount of mermaid magic...(Turns to Mindy)...or managerial promotion... (Turns to the frozen Mr. Krabs)...or some other third thing...can make me anything more than what I really am inside: A kid.
Plankton: That's great. Now, get back against the wall.
SpongeBob: But that's okay.
Plankton: What? What's going on?
SpongeBob: Because I did what everyone said a kid couldn't do. I made it to Shell City, and I beat the Cyclops, and I rode the Hasselhoff, and I brought the crown back.
Plankton: All right, we get the point.
SpongeBob: So, yeah, I'm a kid. And I'm also a goofball. And a wing nut. And a Knucklehead McSpazatron!
Plankton: What's going on here?
SpongeBob: But most of all, I'm... (fog starts to appear)
Plankton: Okay, settle down. Take it easy.
SpongeBob: I'm... I'm...
Plankton: What the scallop?!
SpongeBob: (Bursts into song) I'm a Goofy Goober! Rock! (Plankton is flung into the wall) You're a Goofy Goober! Rock! We're all Goofy Goobers! Rock! Goofy, goofy, goober, goober! Put your toys away, Well, all I gotta say when you tell me not to play, I say no way. No way! No, no ******* way! I'm a kid, you say, when you say I'm a kid I say, "Say it again" and then I say thanks. Thanks! Thank you very much! So if you're thinking that you'd like to be like me, Go ahead and try. The kid inside will set you free! I'm a Goofy Goober! Rock!
Plankton: (He is recovering from being flung into the wall) What's happening? (Sees SpongeBob dancing) His dance moves are impressive, but I'm in control. (To slaves) Seize him!
Slaves: All hail Plankton. (Crowd in around SpongeBob. A few seconds later, SpongeBob bursts out in a wizard costume. He is playing a guitar, which he uses to free a fish)
Fish: (After SpongeBob zaps his helmet, and it comes off)I'm free. I've been freed!
Plankton: What? (SpongeBob zaps more helmets off) No! (More helmets come off) My precious helmets! (SpongeBob zaps the helmets off Squidward, Mrs. Puff, Sandy, and Gary)
Sandy: (last lines) Yee-haw!
Gary: (last lines) Meow.
Plankton: His chops are too righteous. The helmets can't handle this level of rock 'n' roll. Karen, do something. Karen? (Looks for her. She is surfing the crowd) All right, that's the last straw. Neptune, I command you to...(SpongeBob frees Neptune. Mindy hands him his crown)
Mindy: Here you go, Daddy.
Plankton: I better get out of here. (Runs for the door, but more freed fish burst in)
Fish: Look, it's the wizard who saved us.
Plankton: Out of my way, fools. (The freed fish ignore him and rush to see SpongeBob, running over Plankton in the process)Ow! Ow! Ow! (yelping)
Outside the Krusty Krab, later
Plankton: (last lines) (He is know squished into the form of a shoe. The policemen pick him up and put him in a cage) Come on, I was just kidding. Come on, you guys knew that, didn't you? With the helmets and the big monuments...Wasn't that hilarious, everybody? (His cage is put in a police car, which drives away) I will destroy all of you! (Everyone that was watching go inside the Krusty Krab 2)
Inside the Krusty Krab 2
Neptune: Well, Mindy, I have to admit, you were right. Your compassion for these sea creatures proved a most admirable trait. Without it, I would have never again seen my beloved crown. I think you're going to make a fine ruler of the sea one day. Now, let's go home. (Turns to leave, but is stopped by Mindy)
Mindy: (last lines) Daddy, haven't you forgotten something?
Neptune: What? Oh, yeah. Eugene Krabs, I forgot to unfreeze you. (He does so, but Mr. Krabs is now a human instead of a crab)
Krabs Boy: What the...?
Neptune: I guess I had it set to "real boy" ending. (Sets it right) He then turns Krabs back into a crab) Oh, I'm sorry for falsely freezing you, Krabs. And may I say, sir, you are a very lucky fellow to have in your employment such a brave, faithful, and heroic young lad. Where is he, anyway?
SpongeBob: I'm up here. (We see him hanging from ropes)
Patrick: (Last lines) I'm on it. (Gets SpongeBob down)
Neptune: (Last lines) Go to him now, Krabs. Embrace him. (Krabs walks over to SpongeBob)
Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob, me boy, I'm sorry I ever doubted ye. That's a mistake I won't make again.
SpongeBob: Oh, Mr. Krabs, you old soft-serve. (They hug)
Mr. Krabs: And now, SpongeBob, I'm gonna do something that I should've done six days ago. Mr. Squidward! Front and center, please. (Squidward comes)I think we all know who rightfully deserves to wear that manager pin. (Looks at SpongeBob)
Squidward: I couldn't agree more, sir.
Mr. Krabs: (Last lines) Hooray for SpongeBob!
SpongeBob: Wait a second, everybody. There's something I need to say first. I just don't know how to put it.
Squidward: (Last lines) I think I know what it is. After going on your life-changing journey, you now realize you don't want what you thought you wanted. What you really wanted was inside you all along.
SpongeBob: (Last lines) Are you crazy? (Grabs manager pin)I was just gonna say that your fly is down! (Squidward's eyes widen) Manager! This is the greatest day of my life! (Jumps high up into the air, nearly hitting the roof. The credits begin rolling, and music plays)
Music: Ocean Man
Ocean Man, Take me by the hand, Lead me to the land, That you understand.
Ocean Man, The voyage to the corner of the globe is a real trip, Ocean Man, The crust of the tan man inhibited by the sun, Soaking up the thirst of the land.
Ocean Man, Can you see through the wonder of amazement? At the oberman? Ocean Man,
The crust is elusive when it casts forth, To the childlike man. Ocean Man,
The sequence of a life form braised in the sand, Soaking up the thirst of the land. Ocean Man,
(Guitar Playing)
Ocean Man, Ocean Man, Ocean Man,
The sequence of a life form braised in the sand, Soaking up the thirst of the land, Ocean Man.
(Song Ends, then we hear a new song playing)
Music: SpongeBob and Patrick Confront the Psychic Wall of Energy
Patrick, you see, I'm growing a mustache
And though I know I must ask you. Does it really make me look like a man?
SpongeBob, being a man is just a tough job. I hope you're picked to be the best SpongeBob’s ever had Working like a dog at the Krusty Krab.
Now wait a minute I think we hit a wall I think we hit a psychic wall.
Maybe we're just young and we won't know 'til we're old. Too young to free ourselves from this lonely fish bowl.
Some kind of wall Some kind of psychic wall Some kind of wall Some kind of psychic wall We can get a burn
Come on, let's find a way to be happy, Not like Plankton, he will never be satisfied, Always complaining about his life, To his computer wife. You think he would've found by now, To be sought as a king, We don't need a burn.
(Song ends again, then a new song plays)
Music: Just a Kid
Maybe I'm just a kid, Maybe I just don't fit in. I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, to go now. I don't want to go to school, But don't get to I make the rules, To early, to early, to early, to early in the morning.
Everybody, everybody, everybody, everybody, Has to do something they don't want to do. Everybody, everybody, everybody, everybody, Has to do something, oh why's that true?
Maybe I'm not so big, Maybe I just don't fit in. I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready for more now. I don't want to go to bed, So much going on in my head, Not tired, Not tired, Not tired, Not tired right now.
Everybody, everybody,everybody ,everybody, Has to do something they don't want to do. Everybody, everybody, everybody, everybody, has to do something, oh why's that true?
Everybody (x15) Everybody has to do something, to have fun. Na Na's Everybody (x13) Anyone who's somebody, anybody has to grow up to have some fun.
(Song ends again, then another song plays)
Music: The Best Day Ever Mr. Sun came up and he smiled at me,
Said it’s gonna be a good one, just wait and see. Jumped out of bed and I ran outside feeling so extra-ecstatified.
It’s the best day ever (best day ever) It’s the best day ever (best day ever)
I’m so busy, got nothing to do, Spent the last two hours just tying my shoe. Every flower, every grain of sand is reaching out to shake my hand.
It’s the best day ever (best day ever) It’s the best day ever (best day ever)
Sometimes the little things start closing in on me. When I’m feeling down, I want to lose that frown, I stick my head out the window and I look around.
Those clouds don’t scare me; they can’t disguise, This magic that’s happenin’ right before my eyes. Soon Mr. Moon will be shining bright so the best day ever can last all night, Yeah, the best day ever’s gonna last all night now.
It’s the best day ever (best day ever) It’s the best day ever (best day ever) It’s the best day ever (best day ever) It’s the best day ever (best day ever) Best day ever Best day ever
(a curtain goes over the screen, then scene shows the pirates again)
The Theater
Captain: (After the movie is completely over) You know, David Hasselhoff is a great artist.
Usher: Excuse me, sir. You folks have to leave.
Captain: What? Say that again, if you dare. (Points his sword at her)
Usher: You folks have to leave.
Captain: Okay. (Him and all of the other pirates leave)
| The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie Transcript |
| Part 1 ● Part 2 ● Part 3 ● Part 4 ● Part 5 |
| The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie |
|
Characters: David Hasselhoff • Dennis (eliminator) • Cyclops • Goofy Goober • Karen • King Neptune • Mr. Krabs • Patrick Star • Mindy • Sheldon J. Plankton • SpongeBob SquarePants • Gas Station Attendants • Car Stealer |
